Stars by shannyfish
Author's Chapter Notes: MUWAHAHAHA! I have returned!!!!!! The Opal has poked me into writing or at least finishing for my SGAs.
2006 ~ Puddle Jumper
John was a bit nervous, he knew it was silly, but that was just how he felt. Why should he? Oh wait, that’s right, he was planning on sleeping with his commander and getting her pregnant later that night. Maybe it was the fact that he liked his job. Maybe it was the fact that he had more leeway, that he had friends who he considered ‘friends’, and then there was always his cool ride. The IOA could take it all away from him…from Elizabeth if they followed through with their plans. Was he giving up the life he knew?
Was a child worth losing his life? He wasn’t even sure if he would be in the child that would be created’s life. He already had a daughter that didn’t seem to like him that much. Lily wasn’t even supposed to be there. He couldn’t love her...the universe and future would change now with them there. It was completely possible that Lily would never exist. Her reality could entirely be an alternate universe.
John sighed and leaned back in chair in the puddle jumper. He sucked in breath and closed his eyes. He tilted his head upward towards the ceiling. He just stopped and tried to push everything out of his mind. It was nice to be away from the others…from noise…from responsibility… After a moment, his eyes snapped open and he pushed himself out of the seat. He hurried out of the jumper and started to look around the bay. He was looking for a particular one. The jumper was practically forbidden, but John had a thought.
The PJ1NE was in sight and John headed for it. For some reason he felt like it held answers. He wasn’t sure if it did or even IF it did if those answers would ease him…but John felt the need to find out. He stood several feet away from the closed hatch and thought one thing.
The Ancient Grandfather.
The sound of the puddle jumper’s ramp opening triggered John’s eyes to open and once it settled in place he headed upward and inward. He stopped halfway up the ramp when he heard a familiar voice.
His.
He heard laughter accompany it and it forced him into the jumper. On the jumper’s screen it appeared to be a family home movie. He was older…he could tell. He could see sadness hiding in his eyes behind the guise of happiness as he played with the toddler.
“That’s Lily,” John spoke up.
“Before or after Elizabeth dies?”
“Right before…” the young Beckett answered. “I think this is the last time you two were happy together,” he explained as the video changed to Lily with a very sick Elizabeth in the infirmary. “You were never to know about this… You would have been so upset.”
John watched in amazement as the young Lily lay with Elizabeth. He found a chair to sink into. The different interior and controls of the puddle jumper didn’t even catch his attention as his green eyes stayed fixed to the screen. His gut twisted and his heart tightened as he watched Elizabeth and Lily. The pure joy and happiness on Elizabeth’s pale, pale face was enough to bring tears to his eyes. She was at death’s doorstep, but her…THEIR daughter was enough to bring light to her. He couldn’t imagine losing her.
How much of Elizabeth was in Lily?
If Lily was like Elizabeth, would losing her be losing Elizabeth still? The tears ran down his cheeks and as much as he wanted to look away, he couldn’t…they were his girls…
He stared at the screen in front of him taking in both Elizabeth and the much younger version of his daughter. Their eyes were the same, he noticed right away. They had the same spirit…and sparkled the same as they played happily. Their hair was also very much alike. What of him was in this child?
Stars.
She had spoken of the stars and flying. Was that the most prominent thing he’d passed on? He wasn’t sure…Elizabeth had spent much more time with the child than he had. He knew hardly anything.
“She can’t die.”
John Beckett’s words pushed through his haze and he focused on the boy. “She’s not going to,” he blurted out not even believing what he was saying.
“If you knew her,” John continued. “If you’d been there…you’d have been proud.”
He didn’t know what to say. He was still shocked at being married to Elizabeth in the future life. He didn’t want to add Lily in on top of it. He didn’t think he could handle it. Perhaps he was a completely different person in that life? “Are there files on this jumper from your Atlantis?” Sheppard asked.
John merely shrugged, “You’re free to look,” he said before sending the command to turn off the video. He wiped his face before he picked up what he’d originally gone to the jumper for a bag that he’d stowed under one of the bench seats. John didn’t have anything more to say and exited the jumper in silence.
He took a minute to breathe and calm a bit before activating his comm, “Rodney, report to the jumper bay and bring your daughter.” Taking his chance, he wiped the tears from his face. John Sheppard felt so overloaded by the events of the future he didn’t know what else to do other than call in reinforcements to assist him. Maybe his future self’s files had been transferred to the puddle jumper. He knew that the jumper couldn’t hold all the files that Atlantis would hold, but some…some could help.
*~*~*
2006 ~ Jumper Bay
“You’ve been awfully quiet,” Rodney commented as they headed for the only open jumper.
Aubrey McKay remained silent, but stopped quickly when she noticed the jumper was not one of the standard Atlantis jumpers, no, this was the PJ1NE. “Sheppard! Out of our jumper!” Aubrey started to yell as she hurried towards the jumper.
Rodney stood there in shock at the fact that his daughter was a lot louder than he had encountered before. “Aubrey! Calm down!” he shouted after her as he followed.
She halted once she got to the ramp. She found John Sheppard sitting on one of the back benches of the jumper with his hands shielding his face. Her voice lightened from before, “You shouldn’t be here…” Her hand found the threshold of the jumper and she rested there. She studied Sheppard’s quiet form for a moment before speaking again, “What did you need help with?” She had discovered that sometimes a quiet tone of voice and changing the subject helped people to talk.
Rodney wandered up behind his daughter and peeked over her shoulder. “How did you get in here?” Rodney asked and then started to take in the shiny and different interior of the puddle jumper. “Excuse me,” Rodney said trying to get past his daughter in order to further investigate the jumper.
“No farther,” Aubrey said not moving out of the way. She directed her attention back to the out of place silent adult. “Sheppard. Speak.”
“I need your help” John admitted.
“Right,” Rodney spoke up. “That’s why you naturally called me down here.”
“How much of Atlantis was downloaded?” John asked looking directly at Aubrey.
“Oh…you meant her,” Rodney muttered.
“She is a McKay, too,” John said quickly.
“I didn’t upload ANY of the Atlantis database,” Aubrey reported. “I’m sorry, Sir.”
John’s face fell, “I was hoping for something…something to possibly help us…help Lily.”
“But,” Aubrey said, “Grandfather DID put in a ‘hidden’ bundled data packet.”
“Hidden?” John questioned.
Aubrey shrugged, “I got bored and accidentally located it.”
“Did you accidentally peek at it as well?” Rodney asked incredulously.
Ignoring her father, she looked to John. “It’s too big a file size to ever extract on our systems.”
“It could help Lily,” John told her. “You’re her best friend, I’m sure you’d love to help her.”
Aubrey nodded slowly, she missed Lily…the Lily that smiled and always had a plan for something. “It’s labeled time capsule,” she told him. “It could contain files that you are looking for.”
“Would you mind letting your father through or will you unlock it for us?” John asked.
“He came in,” Aubrey said as she looked over to her father, “As long as he doesn’t break anything.”
“C’mon,” Rodney said sounding as hurt as possible. “You think I’d do that?”
“I’ve read reports.”
*~*~*
TBC…
John was a bit nervous, he knew it was silly, but that was just how he felt. Why should he? Oh wait, that’s right, he was planning on sleeping with his commander and getting her pregnant later that night. Maybe it was the fact that he liked his job. Maybe it was the fact that he had more leeway, that he had friends who he considered ‘friends’, and then there was always his cool ride. The IOA could take it all away from him…from Elizabeth if they followed through with their plans. Was he giving up the life he knew?
Was a child worth losing his life? He wasn’t even sure if he would be in the child that would be created’s life. He already had a daughter that didn’t seem to like him that much. Lily wasn’t even supposed to be there. He couldn’t love her...the universe and future would change now with them there. It was completely possible that Lily would never exist. Her reality could entirely be an alternate universe.
John sighed and leaned back in chair in the puddle jumper. He sucked in breath and closed his eyes. He tilted his head upward towards the ceiling. He just stopped and tried to push everything out of his mind. It was nice to be away from the others…from noise…from responsibility… After a moment, his eyes snapped open and he pushed himself out of the seat. He hurried out of the jumper and started to look around the bay. He was looking for a particular one. The jumper was practically forbidden, but John had a thought.
The PJ1NE was in sight and John headed for it. For some reason he felt like it held answers. He wasn’t sure if it did or even IF it did if those answers would ease him…but John felt the need to find out. He stood several feet away from the closed hatch and thought one thing.
The Ancient Grandfather.
The sound of the puddle jumper’s ramp opening triggered John’s eyes to open and once it settled in place he headed upward and inward. He stopped halfway up the ramp when he heard a familiar voice.
His.
He heard laughter accompany it and it forced him into the jumper. On the jumper’s screen it appeared to be a family home movie. He was older…he could tell. He could see sadness hiding in his eyes behind the guise of happiness as he played with the toddler.
“That’s Lily,” John spoke up.
“Before or after Elizabeth dies?”
“Right before…” the young Beckett answered. “I think this is the last time you two were happy together,” he explained as the video changed to Lily with a very sick Elizabeth in the infirmary. “You were never to know about this… You would have been so upset.”
John watched in amazement as the young Lily lay with Elizabeth. He found a chair to sink into. The different interior and controls of the puddle jumper didn’t even catch his attention as his green eyes stayed fixed to the screen. His gut twisted and his heart tightened as he watched Elizabeth and Lily. The pure joy and happiness on Elizabeth’s pale, pale face was enough to bring tears to his eyes. She was at death’s doorstep, but her…THEIR daughter was enough to bring light to her. He couldn’t imagine losing her.
How much of Elizabeth was in Lily?
If Lily was like Elizabeth, would losing her be losing Elizabeth still? The tears ran down his cheeks and as much as he wanted to look away, he couldn’t…they were his girls…
He stared at the screen in front of him taking in both Elizabeth and the much younger version of his daughter. Their eyes were the same, he noticed right away. They had the same spirit…and sparkled the same as they played happily. Their hair was also very much alike. What of him was in this child?
Stars.
She had spoken of the stars and flying. Was that the most prominent thing he’d passed on? He wasn’t sure…Elizabeth had spent much more time with the child than he had. He knew hardly anything.
“She can’t die.”
John Beckett’s words pushed through his haze and he focused on the boy. “She’s not going to,” he blurted out not even believing what he was saying.
“If you knew her,” John continued. “If you’d been there…you’d have been proud.”
He didn’t know what to say. He was still shocked at being married to Elizabeth in the future life. He didn’t want to add Lily in on top of it. He didn’t think he could handle it. Perhaps he was a completely different person in that life? “Are there files on this jumper from your Atlantis?” Sheppard asked.
John merely shrugged, “You’re free to look,” he said before sending the command to turn off the video. He wiped his face before he picked up what he’d originally gone to the jumper for a bag that he’d stowed under one of the bench seats. John didn’t have anything more to say and exited the jumper in silence.
He took a minute to breathe and calm a bit before activating his comm, “Rodney, report to the jumper bay and bring your daughter.” Taking his chance, he wiped the tears from his face. John Sheppard felt so overloaded by the events of the future he didn’t know what else to do other than call in reinforcements to assist him. Maybe his future self’s files had been transferred to the puddle jumper. He knew that the jumper couldn’t hold all the files that Atlantis would hold, but some…some could help.
*~*~*
2006 ~ Jumper Bay
“You’ve been awfully quiet,” Rodney commented as they headed for the only open jumper.
Aubrey McKay remained silent, but stopped quickly when she noticed the jumper was not one of the standard Atlantis jumpers, no, this was the PJ1NE. “Sheppard! Out of our jumper!” Aubrey started to yell as she hurried towards the jumper.
Rodney stood there in shock at the fact that his daughter was a lot louder than he had encountered before. “Aubrey! Calm down!” he shouted after her as he followed.
She halted once she got to the ramp. She found John Sheppard sitting on one of the back benches of the jumper with his hands shielding his face. Her voice lightened from before, “You shouldn’t be here…” Her hand found the threshold of the jumper and she rested there. She studied Sheppard’s quiet form for a moment before speaking again, “What did you need help with?” She had discovered that sometimes a quiet tone of voice and changing the subject helped people to talk.
Rodney wandered up behind his daughter and peeked over her shoulder. “How did you get in here?” Rodney asked and then started to take in the shiny and different interior of the puddle jumper. “Excuse me,” Rodney said trying to get past his daughter in order to further investigate the jumper.
“No farther,” Aubrey said not moving out of the way. She directed her attention back to the out of place silent adult. “Sheppard. Speak.”
“I need your help” John admitted.
“Right,” Rodney spoke up. “That’s why you naturally called me down here.”
“How much of Atlantis was downloaded?” John asked looking directly at Aubrey.
“Oh…you meant her,” Rodney muttered.
“She is a McKay, too,” John said quickly.
“I didn’t upload ANY of the Atlantis database,” Aubrey reported. “I’m sorry, Sir.”
John’s face fell, “I was hoping for something…something to possibly help us…help Lily.”
“But,” Aubrey said, “Grandfather DID put in a ‘hidden’ bundled data packet.”
“Hidden?” John questioned.
Aubrey shrugged, “I got bored and accidentally located it.”
“Did you accidentally peek at it as well?” Rodney asked incredulously.
Ignoring her father, she looked to John. “It’s too big a file size to ever extract on our systems.”
“It could help Lily,” John told her. “You’re her best friend, I’m sure you’d love to help her.”
Aubrey nodded slowly, she missed Lily…the Lily that smiled and always had a plan for something. “It’s labeled time capsule,” she told him. “It could contain files that you are looking for.”
“Would you mind letting your father through or will you unlock it for us?” John asked.
“He came in,” Aubrey said as she looked over to her father, “As long as he doesn’t break anything.”
“C’mon,” Rodney said sounding as hurt as possible. “You think I’d do that?”
“I’ve read reports.”
*~*~*
TBC…