Reviews For You Are Not Alone
Reviewer: embla91 Signed
Date: January 16, 2008 - 09:06 am
Title: Chapter 1
really lovely story... but kind off hard to read.
great first chapter! =)
Reviewer: Angie Signed
Date: January 16, 2008 - 05:44 am
Title: Chapter 1
Hey there! Welcome to the world of fanfic-writers. ;D
I really like this first chapter here. It has that sweet touch of Sparky in it, and Carson is present as well. So, who wouldn't like it? *lol*
Just one suggestion. Maybe you can work a bit on the text again and put some breaks in it. It's really hard to read on when the text looks like one giant paragraph. It's always good to put a break after every line a character speaks and some general breaks after explanatuions etc. That makes the whole story way lighter than it looks now and I guess more people would be ready to read it.
Again: great first chapter. Keep it up!
