Title: Still Waters
Author: Espiritu
Rating: PG
Category: Post-epi/missing scene from 'The
Eye',Romance/Angst,Sheppard/Weir
Spoilers: 'The Eye', '38 Minutes'
Summary: Sheppard's and Weir's thoughts after The Eye.
Disclaimer: I can wish all I want, but Stargate Atlantis and its
characters belong to MGM not me. I just like to take them out and
play with them from time to time.
Still Waters
Standing on the balcony watching the sun slowly set over the
horizon, Major John Sheppard reflected on the day's traumatic
events. The now calm sea gave no hint to the recent storm that had
battered the immense city or to the heated battle that had been
waged within its ancient walls. As Sheppard watched the colors of
the sky change with the fading of the day, his thoughts replayed
the events that transpired only a short time ago.
It had only been a few short hours since the inhabitants of Atlantis
regained control of the city from the invading Genii. Only hours since
the one most dear to him had almost been lost.
He thought she had died. When Koyla cut off his transmission and
did not respond to Sheppard's frantic cries, he was sure Weir was
dead. Dead at the hands of Koyla. And with her, died his heart and
soul.
Fueled by grief, rage, and lust for blood, he vowed to make Koyla
pay dearly for taking Weir from him. Nothing else but revenge
mattered to him once she was gone. With stealth and cunning, he
ruthlessly hunted Koyla down. The price Koyla paid was with his life.
Only now that the storm surge had passed and the vengeful fire
that had raged inside him had cooled, could Sheppard allow any
regret to surface. He would have to live with his actions of this day.
With the danger he allowed to enter the city, with the hostage
situation he allowed to escalate, and with the lives he had taken in
revenge. The tragic images of the day's events would haunt his
dreams for some time to come.
Even lost in thought, he knew when she stepped out onto the
balcony even though she made no sound as she slipped through
the doorway. Even if he had been struck deaf and blind, he would
have still sensed her nearby silently watching him. She left an
indelible mark on his soul that signaled her presence without need
of mere sight and sound.
He never expected to fall in love. It was the furthest thing from his
mind when he joined this expedition. Yet there was just something
about Elizabeth Weir that had quietly taken hold of his heart until
she held it in the palm of her hand. He didn't know if she was aware
of what she held in her possession, but he hoped she would never
let it go.
Weir watched Sheppard as he quietly contemplated the early
evening sky. As she moved towards him, he spoke without turning.
"How are you really doing?"
Weir walked up and stood beside him at the railing. "I'm fine now,
thanks to you. I don't want to think about how this day could have
ended if you hadn't been here."
"I don't think those who died today would thank me. Neither would
their families." Sheppard replied ruefully.
"John, you did what you had to do. If you didn't, more lives would
have been lost, and the city would now be in the hands of the Genii.
If you hadn't killed Koyla, I would probably be dead."
Sheppard felt sick to his stomach remembering Koyla holding
Elizabeth hostage. Remembering how his heart stopped when he
rushed into the control room to see Koyla holding the gun to her
head. How he tried not to think of possibly losing her again as he
took aim. Tried not to see the look of fear in her eyes as he fired.
"I could have killed you. If I had missed Koyla, I could have been the
one that killed you, not him." Sheppard's voice wavered slightly as
he remembered how close the bullet that struck the Genii
commander had come to hitting Elizabeth instead.
Weir heard the tremor in his voice, saw his jaw tighten with the
memory of her held hostage, knew the raw emotions he finally
allowed to surface were threatening to drown him. Gone for the
moment was the cocky flyboy with the boyish grin and irreverent
sense of humor. Here was a man still trying to reconcile the
emotional extremes he experienced during the day. The fear, the
grief, the sorrow, the anger, and finally the joyous relief.
Weir reached out and gripped his arm, forcing him to face her as
she spoke. "I am alive because of you. I owe you my life. And I am
glad you did what you did."
Looking at the hazel eyes gazing so intently up at him, Sheppard
saw the concern mirrored in their depths, heard the intensity in her
voice, and saw she too was still shaken by her brush with death. He
allowed her words to wash over him, knowing they could never
completely erase the guilt and pain from seeing her suffer.
"I should have never taken that chance with your life. It was bad
enough when I thought Koyla had killed you, but if you had gotten
injured or killed because of my actions, I don't know how I would
have lived with myself for having hurt you." Sheppard's final words
trailed off in a whisper as he turned back to look over the
surrounding sea.
He looked shaken and tired. Weir knew what he was going through.
She herself remembered how she upset she had been when the
major was trapped in the stargate with that life-sucking wraith-bug
clinging to his neck. She still had nightmares about his still and pale
form lying in the jumper while Dr. Beckett worked feverishly to
restart his heart. As worried as she had been for every team
member almost lost that day, it was the near death of John
Sheppard that had frightened her most.
Every time he went on a mission, she felt she could not breathe
easily until he returned safe and sound. When he came back
wounded, she waited outside the infirmary, her heart heavy
and filled with dread until she got word that he would be okay. Yes,
she knew how he felt, because she felt it too.
She never planned on falling in love. From the first time she saw him
sit in the Ancient's chair, she knew he was special. Even if he didn't
have the gene that allowed him to control the Ancient technology
with such natural finesse, she could still see something special
about him.
She sensed from the beginning there were many hidden layers to
the wise-cracking pilot with a distrust of authority. Layers that went
beyond the irresistible charm, and wildly appealing looks. Even
beyond the quiet confidence and courage under fire she discovered
over the past months. Like still waters, the essence of John
Sheppard lay deep under the surface. As her friendship with him
grew, she peeled back the layers and found a sharp intelligence,
lively wit, fierce loyalty, keen perception, and extraordinary
compassion. All these qualities made up the man before her, the
man she cared about more than her position of diplomat and
expedition leader normally allowed.
Standing next to him, she leaned her arms on the balcony rail and
watched him as he was backlit by the setting sun. The last vestiges
of daylight played across his face, illuminating the fatigue etched on
his features. She did not know how he was still standing. He looked
ready to drop where he stood. The adrenaline rush that fueled him
during the clash of wills with Koyla had long since gone. Now only
exhaustion was left in its place.
Weir looked up into his pained green eyes once again. "Yes, John, I
was frightened."
His jaw again clenched when he heard her admission of fear. She
softened her expression and touched his cheek as she continued.
"But not that you would hit me instead of Koyla. I was afraid that
Koyla would shoot first, and I would never have the chance to let
you know how I feel. To tell you how much you mean to me. Not
just on a professional level, but a personal one."
Her words took him by surprise. He knew Elizabeth enjoyed their
playful banter, their late night chats over coffee, their informal
meetings on the balcony after a mission, even their occasional
disagreements, but he assumed she wanted nothing more than
friendship. She had yet to show that she had succumbed to his
boyish charm, regardless of how much she flirted back when they
were alone.
Until now, she had kept their relationship on a strictly professional
level. Whenever they came close to acknowledging their true
feelings, she retreated behind the sense of propriety created by the
regulations and responsibilities that governed her as leader of
Atlantis. At those times, the gap separating boss and subordinate,
civilian scientist and military soldier seemed too wide to bridge. But
today changed all that. Today they had to face the possibility of
losing each other, making each of them realize their relationship
should be treasured not denied.
She watched the look of anguish fade, replaced with an expression
of hope as some of the tension eased from his face. His spirit
uplifted by the knowledge she was safe and truly his. A small grin
creased his mouth and a glimmer of his usual sense of humor
resurfaced.
"So that knight in shining armor routine really worked? If I had
known that's all it took for you to admit your undying devotion for
me, Liz, I would have played the hero a long time ago."
"I have to admit a dramatic rescue does hold a certain appeal...but
I'd rather you'd give me a heads up the next time you try a stunt
like that." She smiled back and nudged him playfully in the arm, glad
to see a measure of happiness return to his eyes.
"Yes ma'am. Duly noted." A hint of the familiar smile she loved so
well played across his face. "As long as you stay out of trouble, I
won't have to pull any more stunts like that."
"Look who's talking about staying out of trouble. You certainly find
enough of it on every mission. I really wish you would put yourself
in danger less often. Every time you walk through the gate, I worry
that you may not come back."
"I promise to always come back. I have to...because you're here.
And that's where I want to be." He spoke the last part softly as he
wrapped his arm around his waist, holding her close. Quietly
embracing, together they watched the evening stars come out and
shine down upon them.
The End
Author: Espiritu
Rating: PG
Category: Post-epi/missing scene from 'The
Eye',Romance/Angst,Sheppard/Weir
Spoilers: 'The Eye', '38 Minutes'
Summary: Sheppard's and Weir's thoughts after The Eye.
Disclaimer: I can wish all I want, but Stargate Atlantis and its
characters belong to MGM not me. I just like to take them out and
play with them from time to time.
Still Waters
Standing on the balcony watching the sun slowly set over the
horizon, Major John Sheppard reflected on the day's traumatic
events. The now calm sea gave no hint to the recent storm that had
battered the immense city or to the heated battle that had been
waged within its ancient walls. As Sheppard watched the colors of
the sky change with the fading of the day, his thoughts replayed
the events that transpired only a short time ago.
It had only been a few short hours since the inhabitants of Atlantis
regained control of the city from the invading Genii. Only hours since
the one most dear to him had almost been lost.
He thought she had died. When Koyla cut off his transmission and
did not respond to Sheppard's frantic cries, he was sure Weir was
dead. Dead at the hands of Koyla. And with her, died his heart and
soul.
Fueled by grief, rage, and lust for blood, he vowed to make Koyla
pay dearly for taking Weir from him. Nothing else but revenge
mattered to him once she was gone. With stealth and cunning, he
ruthlessly hunted Koyla down. The price Koyla paid was with his life.
Only now that the storm surge had passed and the vengeful fire
that had raged inside him had cooled, could Sheppard allow any
regret to surface. He would have to live with his actions of this day.
With the danger he allowed to enter the city, with the hostage
situation he allowed to escalate, and with the lives he had taken in
revenge. The tragic images of the day's events would haunt his
dreams for some time to come.
Even lost in thought, he knew when she stepped out onto the
balcony even though she made no sound as she slipped through
the doorway. Even if he had been struck deaf and blind, he would
have still sensed her nearby silently watching him. She left an
indelible mark on his soul that signaled her presence without need
of mere sight and sound.
He never expected to fall in love. It was the furthest thing from his
mind when he joined this expedition. Yet there was just something
about Elizabeth Weir that had quietly taken hold of his heart until
she held it in the palm of her hand. He didn't know if she was aware
of what she held in her possession, but he hoped she would never
let it go.
Weir watched Sheppard as he quietly contemplated the early
evening sky. As she moved towards him, he spoke without turning.
"How are you really doing?"
Weir walked up and stood beside him at the railing. "I'm fine now,
thanks to you. I don't want to think about how this day could have
ended if you hadn't been here."
"I don't think those who died today would thank me. Neither would
their families." Sheppard replied ruefully.
"John, you did what you had to do. If you didn't, more lives would
have been lost, and the city would now be in the hands of the Genii.
If you hadn't killed Koyla, I would probably be dead."
Sheppard felt sick to his stomach remembering Koyla holding
Elizabeth hostage. Remembering how his heart stopped when he
rushed into the control room to see Koyla holding the gun to her
head. How he tried not to think of possibly losing her again as he
took aim. Tried not to see the look of fear in her eyes as he fired.
"I could have killed you. If I had missed Koyla, I could have been the
one that killed you, not him." Sheppard's voice wavered slightly as
he remembered how close the bullet that struck the Genii
commander had come to hitting Elizabeth instead.
Weir heard the tremor in his voice, saw his jaw tighten with the
memory of her held hostage, knew the raw emotions he finally
allowed to surface were threatening to drown him. Gone for the
moment was the cocky flyboy with the boyish grin and irreverent
sense of humor. Here was a man still trying to reconcile the
emotional extremes he experienced during the day. The fear, the
grief, the sorrow, the anger, and finally the joyous relief.
Weir reached out and gripped his arm, forcing him to face her as
she spoke. "I am alive because of you. I owe you my life. And I am
glad you did what you did."
Looking at the hazel eyes gazing so intently up at him, Sheppard
saw the concern mirrored in their depths, heard the intensity in her
voice, and saw she too was still shaken by her brush with death. He
allowed her words to wash over him, knowing they could never
completely erase the guilt and pain from seeing her suffer.
"I should have never taken that chance with your life. It was bad
enough when I thought Koyla had killed you, but if you had gotten
injured or killed because of my actions, I don't know how I would
have lived with myself for having hurt you." Sheppard's final words
trailed off in a whisper as he turned back to look over the
surrounding sea.
He looked shaken and tired. Weir knew what he was going through.
She herself remembered how she upset she had been when the
major was trapped in the stargate with that life-sucking wraith-bug
clinging to his neck. She still had nightmares about his still and pale
form lying in the jumper while Dr. Beckett worked feverishly to
restart his heart. As worried as she had been for every team
member almost lost that day, it was the near death of John
Sheppard that had frightened her most.
Every time he went on a mission, she felt she could not breathe
easily until he returned safe and sound. When he came back
wounded, she waited outside the infirmary, her heart heavy
and filled with dread until she got word that he would be okay. Yes,
she knew how he felt, because she felt it too.
She never planned on falling in love. From the first time she saw him
sit in the Ancient's chair, she knew he was special. Even if he didn't
have the gene that allowed him to control the Ancient technology
with such natural finesse, she could still see something special
about him.
She sensed from the beginning there were many hidden layers to
the wise-cracking pilot with a distrust of authority. Layers that went
beyond the irresistible charm, and wildly appealing looks. Even
beyond the quiet confidence and courage under fire she discovered
over the past months. Like still waters, the essence of John
Sheppard lay deep under the surface. As her friendship with him
grew, she peeled back the layers and found a sharp intelligence,
lively wit, fierce loyalty, keen perception, and extraordinary
compassion. All these qualities made up the man before her, the
man she cared about more than her position of diplomat and
expedition leader normally allowed.
Standing next to him, she leaned her arms on the balcony rail and
watched him as he was backlit by the setting sun. The last vestiges
of daylight played across his face, illuminating the fatigue etched on
his features. She did not know how he was still standing. He looked
ready to drop where he stood. The adrenaline rush that fueled him
during the clash of wills with Koyla had long since gone. Now only
exhaustion was left in its place.
Weir looked up into his pained green eyes once again. "Yes, John, I
was frightened."
His jaw again clenched when he heard her admission of fear. She
softened her expression and touched his cheek as she continued.
"But not that you would hit me instead of Koyla. I was afraid that
Koyla would shoot first, and I would never have the chance to let
you know how I feel. To tell you how much you mean to me. Not
just on a professional level, but a personal one."
Her words took him by surprise. He knew Elizabeth enjoyed their
playful banter, their late night chats over coffee, their informal
meetings on the balcony after a mission, even their occasional
disagreements, but he assumed she wanted nothing more than
friendship. She had yet to show that she had succumbed to his
boyish charm, regardless of how much she flirted back when they
were alone.
Until now, she had kept their relationship on a strictly professional
level. Whenever they came close to acknowledging their true
feelings, she retreated behind the sense of propriety created by the
regulations and responsibilities that governed her as leader of
Atlantis. At those times, the gap separating boss and subordinate,
civilian scientist and military soldier seemed too wide to bridge. But
today changed all that. Today they had to face the possibility of
losing each other, making each of them realize their relationship
should be treasured not denied.
She watched the look of anguish fade, replaced with an expression
of hope as some of the tension eased from his face. His spirit
uplifted by the knowledge she was safe and truly his. A small grin
creased his mouth and a glimmer of his usual sense of humor
resurfaced.
"So that knight in shining armor routine really worked? If I had
known that's all it took for you to admit your undying devotion for
me, Liz, I would have played the hero a long time ago."
"I have to admit a dramatic rescue does hold a certain appeal...but
I'd rather you'd give me a heads up the next time you try a stunt
like that." She smiled back and nudged him playfully in the arm, glad
to see a measure of happiness return to his eyes.
"Yes ma'am. Duly noted." A hint of the familiar smile she loved so
well played across his face. "As long as you stay out of trouble, I
won't have to pull any more stunts like that."
"Look who's talking about staying out of trouble. You certainly find
enough of it on every mission. I really wish you would put yourself
in danger less often. Every time you walk through the gate, I worry
that you may not come back."
"I promise to always come back. I have to...because you're here.
And that's where I want to be." He spoke the last part softly as he
wrapped his arm around his waist, holding her close. Quietly
embracing, together they watched the evening stars come out and
shine down upon them.
The End