Mistakes of the Past by shannyfish
Summary: What happens when parents’ mistakes end up costing lives? Will they have a chance to make up for the mistakes they’ve made?
Categories: Fanfiction Characters: None
Genres: Alternate Universe, Angst, Baby!fic, Drama, Future Fic
Warnings: Character Death, Violence
Challenges: None
Series: Future Kidlet Series
Chapters: 9 Completed: Yes Word count: 16240 Read: 72733 Published: June 17, 2006 Updated: September 23, 2006

1. Suffering by shannyfish

2. Family Ties by shannyfish

3. Continuing Grief by shannyfish

4. Mission: Future by shannyfish

5. The Past Meets the Future by shannyfish

6. Wrap Your Brain Around This! by shannyfish

7. Avoiding Can't Go On Forever by shannyfish

8. Don't Underestimate What You Don't Understand by shannyfish

9. Decisions for the Future by shannyfish

Suffering by shannyfish
Author's Notes:
Hopefully, this will be easier to follow with the years used. I didn’t want it to be too confusing, but some time jumping is necessary in this story before it stays in the same year.
2012 ~ Atlantis

The beeping of the monitor in the medical bay just made the reality of the situation sink in deeper. Carson had tried everything to extend life, but now it was just spiraling downhill. There was nothing more to be done, but to provide comfort. The doctor hadn’t even thought it possible to extend his patient’s life for this long, but when one fights for life, it seems like miracles are a little more likely to happen. He just wished that a miracle could have been strong enough to extend the life to a normal life expectancy. This was one of the downfalls of being a medical doctor, when there was no longer anything to be done, and all that was left was to watch a friend die and others close to that friend suffer.

Walking over to the medical bed, he put his hand on the shoulder of the man who had been sitting in an uncomfortable plastic chair for almost the whole day now. He was asleep, but so was the patient.

“Why don’t you go home and sleep in your own bed?” he offered quietly when the man stirred at his touch. “I’ll call you when she wakes. I promise.”

John Sheppard had been at his wife’s bedside ever since she had grown too ill to leave the infirmary. He’d only leave when forced, and then even then it wasn’t for very long. He had to admit to himself that he could use the personal time. A thick sheet of stubble had grown in and been neglected, and he was sore all over. He could definitely use a hot shower and a good night’s sleep in his own bed.

“You said that maybe she could go home,” he said quietly, looking over to Carson for an answer. John didn’t like the fact that the only reason that Carson would be releasing Elizabeth now would be because there was nothing else he could do for her medically, but keep her comfortable.

“Tomorrow,” Carson promised. “Go home. I’m sure that Marie is still up, so you can pick up Lily if you like.” Lily Sheppard had been affected the most in the current situation, or at least that’s how Carson saw it. Lily was only two, but saw more of his wife than she did of her own parents…and with Elizabeth so close to the end, Carson just wanted Lily to have some memories of her mother.

Rubbing his face a bit, John sighed, “Lily…Lily’s probably fast asleep. I-I’ll get her tomorrow morning…I’ll take her to breakfast,” he said sleepily, even though he knew that he’d be in the infirmary by Elizabeth’s side instead. Lily wasn’t his priority right now. He didn’t want to loose Elizabeth, but it didn’t seem like he had a choice. His choice had been made. Pushing himself to his feet, he walked out of the medical bay and headed straight to his quarters.

His quarters were filled with memories…memories that John didn’t want to face. Every picture frame he passed, he slammed down, not caring if he cracked the glass. Those happy times were gone. His world was slowly crumbling and there was no way he could save it. He was so used to defying the odds, from saving Atlantis when all seemed lost, to the several times everyone thought he was dead and he came through it all. But he couldn’t save it now.

Letting his tired, weary body fall heavily onto the bed. He reached for Elizabeth’s pillow, pulling it to his nose, so breathe in her scent. He had purposely made sure the bedding hadn’t been washed since she had been kept in the medical bay. It was the only way he could fall asleep.


Karelius ~ 2010

“C’mon!” Sheppard shouted and waved the Atlantis team towards where he had parked the jumper. They had gone to Karelius to discuss trade with the natives; that was until the Wraith showed up. The Karelions had failed to tell them when they had first arrived that the Wraith had been harvesting from their planet on a pretty routine basis since their awakening.

He looked back to see that his wife was trailing at the back of the group and that the ships were gaining. “Elizabeth! Move it!” he yelled. Having her on a mission made his nerves fray. He was always more on edge and more cautious. Once it seemed like she had caught up with the others’ pace, he started to turn and head once again towards the jumper. He wanted to get it started so they could leave right away once they were all in.

Ronon, Teyla, and McKay all hurried into the jumper. Teyla was about to tell Sheppard that they needed to go when she noticed they were missing someone. “Colonel. Doctor Weir is missing,” she said looking around.

“She was just behind me!” McKay said panicked. He was about to yell for Elizabeth when he saw a Wraith within view of the cloaked puddle jumper. Instead, his mouth just hung open.

“No one move,” John whispered as they all focused on the Wraith’s movements. It seemed like everything stood still…until a scream rang through cut through the air.

He immediately knew it was Elizabeth, and it felt like his heart stopped. Immediately, he pulled his gun up and headed out of the jumper firing at the Wraith in sight and went in the direction of his wife’s scream. He could hear the footfalls behind him and figured that the others or at least Ronon and Teyla were following to assist.

John’s heart felt cold as he came upon Elizabeth lying lifeless on the ground with a Wraith looming nearby. Pulling back on the trigger, he shot at the Wraith until he was out of bullets. He barely registered McKay’s comment about the Wraith being dead already. He approached her slowly at first, and then ran the few feet and dropped to her side, immediately feeling for a pulse. There was one; faint, but it was there,

“Hold on Elizabeth,” he whispered before scooping her up, knowing that they needed to get her back to Atlantis. He looked her over for wounds, for injuries, for any sign of what had happened to her. Usually the Wraith tried to suck the life out of you literally. That’s when it hit him; if the Wraith had fed off of her, her physical appearance should look different. But she didn’t look aged, like others who had been affected by the Wraith.

Family Ties by shannyfish
Author's Notes:
Hopefully this isn't too confusing!!! I hope that not using months doesn't cause any confusion! Let me know!
Atlantis ~ 2012

The bright light invading from the window woke John from his state of deep sleep. He hadn’t remembered sleeping so solidly in some time. It was nice to get a solid block of sleep, even with the nightmare that accompanied it. Pulling himself up into a sitting position, he dropped his legs over the side of the bed and wearily looked around the bedroom. Bringing his hand up to his face, he rubbed it vigorously, trying to shake the sleep from his rough, unshaven face. John sighed and thought about how hard life was at the moment. He’d get up in a few minutes and start showering, shaving, and getting changed. Although, he had told Carson he’d pick up Lily for breakfast, he had no intention of doing so. He knew Lily would just be fine with Carson, Marie and their son.

Twenty minutes later, he was clean and dressed. Presentable enough to see his wife and he hoped able to take her home. It wasn’t the good feeling he thought it would be. He had dreamed that she would be coming home cured, but that was only a dream now. Carson had tried everything and nothing worked, it had only delayed Elizabeth’s death. But what about him? How would he live without her? Elizabeth had been the one who had gotten him wrapped up in the Atlantis Expedition. She had brought him into a life that had made his worth something…worth living. He didn’t see living worth anything without her.

He sighed when he saw one of the pictures that he hadn’t knocked down the night before. It had been taken right after Lily’s birth. In the image, Elizabeth was in bed with a bright smile on her face, her hair messily pulled back, and Lily bundled up in a pink blanket in her arms. Lily had been their miracle then. Carson hadn’t thought that Elizabeth would make it through the pregnancy, that it would only make things worse. But Elizabeth had been able to hold on for the pregnancy, the birth, and two years now…

Lily would be fine, he immediately thought. Carson and Marie had taken such good care of her. John Beckett, their son, was only a couple months older than Lily, and they seemed like the best of friends. Who better to take care of her?

Making his way to the infirmary, he stopped by the cafeteria and picked up a bit of breakfast, enough for him and Elizabeth if she felt up to eating. John just wanted to be there when she was released and he wanted to take her home as soon as he could. Of course, Carson would be there, and John was sure that the doctor would know that he hadn’t kept his promise to see Lily. But could he really blame him? He was losing Elizabeth, but Lily would still be there…

“Ah, there ya are.”

John cringed and came to a halt wondering if the Scot doctor would just leave him alone without harassing him. The last thing he wanted was to be reamed by Carson Beckett about his techniques as a father. “Yes, I’m here. I was just taking some breakfast to Elizabeth. She should eat something…” He turned to face the other man, even though he’d rather just walk on by.

Carson’s forehead was wrinkled with worry. “Ya did’nt even come by and see Lil’ay this mornin’… The poor lass done think you forgotten about her…” He knew that John’s main concern was Elizabeth, but was he seeing what he was doing to his daughter? Yes, Lillian Sheppard was only two years old, but that didn’t mean that she wasn’t affected by his absence. She cried a lot for him and her mother. Carson just hoped with Elizabeth’s release that Lily would spend more time with her family than the Becketts.


“No, now,” Carson said forcefully.

John glared at the other man, “No…now I’m going to go see my wife. I’ll see Lily tomorrow. She doesn’t even remember… I want to spend time with Elizabeth while we still can.”

“And what about Lil’ay? Don’tcha think that she would want to have some memory of her mother? Don’tcha think Elizabeth would want to spend time with her? I know that Elizabeth misses Lil’ay, but now’s the time for you to bring your whole family together and spend time together,” Carson urged.

“She’s dying, Carson…” John practically whispered. “How can I take care of Lily without her?” He wasn’t sure how he would be able to take care of himself without Elizabeth. She gave him so much support, that he wasn’t sure how he’d manage without it. Let alone how could he raise a toddler? And a girl at that? “Lily needs Elizabeth just as much as I do… How can I just let her go? Lily…Lily will still be here…”

Carson sighed, “Aye, but what happens when Lil’ay starts to grow up and appear more and more like Elizabeth? What then?”

John didn’t say anything, but just pushed past the doctor.

Letting the colonel get away wasn’t something Carson was going to let happen just yet. He grabbed his arm and added, “Lil’ay has been infected with the virus as well, John. She needs ya as much as Elizabeth does…” he said quietly and sadly. It wasn’t news he had wanted to deliver that way, but John needed to know.


Atlantis – 2012

“I dun know how to explain to her that her mother isn’t coming back and that her father has gone off on some damned suicide mission,” Carson explained to his wife. It had been two months since Elizabeth Sheppard had passed and though Lily got to spend some time with her mother before she passed, it had been brief and Carson doubted she’d ever remember it. And soon after, Colonel Sheppard had gone off on some mission and was currently declared MIA.

Marie gave him a small and patted his hand gently, “Carson, this is John Sheppard we’re talking about here. How many times has he been declared MIA only to have him emerge unharmed later? He just needs time to cool off… We should just be thankful that no one’s tried to take Lily away…” That had been Marie’s immediate thought when Steven Caldwell had informed them that the SGC had declared Sheppard MIA. But luckily, Lily had just remained in their safe care. She didn’t mind, she loved having a second child around, but wished that John Sheppard would return and be able to take care of his daughter.

Carson nodded, “Aye… But she wakes up crying for Elizabeth…”

Nodding, Marie knew that this was a problem. “I try to keep photos of Elizabeth. Steven even allowed me access to their quarters so I could collect some pictures along with the rest of Lily’s things so that I could make her a book. But I agree…it’s hard to get a two year old to understand anything, let alone death…” She sighed, “I told her that her mother’s with the angels now… In time, she’ll realize exactly what that means. We just have to get through this hard time.”

“We’ll be here though for her…even when John returns,” he said returning her smile. “I’m sure it’ll take some time for John to get used to raising a daughter… We’ll be here to tell her things about her mother. She’ll want to know and it’ll ease the grief.”

Continuing Grief by shannyfish
2012 ~ Atlantis

It had been two months since Colonel John Sheppard had left on his mission, and he had never returned. There had been no word or proof that he was dead, but he was considered MIA. All that time, Carson and Marie had cared for Lily holding out hope that Sheppard would return.

Carson sighed as he headed for what had been Elizabeth Sheppard’s office, but was now Colonel Caldwell’s office until the SGC could completely decide on a civilian (if they would still keep one) and military commanding officers for Atlantis. He hadn’t liked the idea that Sheppard was considered MIA, but a thought had come about that had been even more chilling to him. How long until John Sheppard was considered KIA? They had reason to believe that all who had left on the mission had died, but would they pursue that avenue with time?

As he approached, he saw that Caldwell had already seen him coming and was motioning him in. Carson took in a deep breath before entering completely. “Colonel,” he said trying to give the man a small, but his lips just stayed in their horizontal position and worry lines littered his forehead.

“If this is about Lillian Sheppard,” Caldwell started. “I can assure you that she will be taken care of with a suitable family back on Earth.”

Carson’s jaw dropped at the thought of Lily being taken away from Atlantis, “But Sir! That’s not even what I came here to talk about… Lillian is doing just fine here. For her to be taken away from this environment could be very bad for her…and Marie and I dun’no mind taking care of her…”

“Don’t you think that that girl deserves a life where she’s not constantly reminded of her parents’ deaths?” Steven asked going through his paperwork. “It’s been two months. If it’s done now, she probably won’t even have any memories of this place.”

“You mean she won’t have any memories of her parents…that’s wrong, Colonel. And yes, it’s ONLY been two months… Colonel Sheppard could very well return…”

“Not all of us are as hopeful as you, Doctor Beckett.” Steven looked up at the man. Carson Beckett was what he would consider a weak man, but then he was a civilian. “I’ll bring up the matter of you and Marie having full custody of Lillian Sheppard upon the next contact with Earth. Now they’re going to have Doctor Heightmeyer’s opinion on placement, so I wouldn’t be holding your breath.”

Carson nodded, “About Colonel Sheppard,” he prodded. “Is there no way to start looking for him and his team again?”

Caldwell shook his head, “Carson, they’re dead. They’re gone. We need to move on.”

“Sir, I think I know John Sheppard better than you…”

“Without Elizabeth here…I doubt we’ll see Sheppard return.”

Frowning grimly, Carson had to mentally agree. He knew that that was one of the reasons why John could leave Lily so easily. Without Elizabeth and his daughter in safe care, did he really have to worry about coming back to Atlantis alive? “Perhaps if you could just…suggest it?”


2018 ~ Atlantis

“Please,” John pouted and then grinned when he heard a familiar giggling. He turned to see Lily behind him.

Carson’s face lit with a smile, “You two in leagues together?” He shook his head. Lily truly reminded him of Elizabeth. “Okay…I’ll talk with Teyla…perhaps we can have a birthday party on the mainland. But,” he said firmly looking at the two, “I’ll have to discuss this with General Caldwell.” He watched as they both rolled their eyes.

Lily sighed and looked down, brushing some stray brownish-red curls away from her face. She looked back up at the man she had called ‘Dad’ since she could remember. She knew Carson Beckett wasn’t her biological father, but he had always been there for her and so had Marie. “Dad, why doesn’t he like me?” she asked quietly.

Frowning, Carson ran his hand through her curls, “It’s not that he doesn’t like you, lass… I think maybe you just remind us all of your mother and father and that can still hurt.”

John hugged Lily and kissed the side of her head, “Don’t worry, Lily. I still like you,” he told her with a bright smile. Lily was his best friend and practically his sister. They’d grown up together and were there when the other got scared in the dark.

Peeking in, Marie smiled, “Darlings...breakfast’s just about ready. And you two let me know if I can make cupcakes for this birthday party.”

Lily and John giggled together as they hugged each other.

Carson just shook his head, “Everyone’s in on this birthday scheme, are they?” he asked no one in particular as he headed for where Marie was setting up.


2018 ~ Atlantis Mainland

The bright day had made for the perfect outing to the Athosian village to celebrate both Lily and John’s birthdays. Carson, Marie, and Teyla had managed to convince most of the children that were around John and Lily’s age to get away for the party. One of the things that Carson thanked God for was that with time, most of the people both on Atlantis and in conjunction with Atlantis had somewhat settled down by getting married and having children. Even Colonel Caldwell had two children, and Carson had even gotten them both allowed to go to the mainland.

“Look at how well they get along,” Teyla commented as she watched the children play. A smile plastered across her face. She had settled down as well, mainly she lived on the mainland, but every now and then she would make special trips to Atlantis or off-world to provide expertise on a mission. But she felt her place was with her people and her son. She had been married for almost twelve years and though she felt old with the passing of time, she felt young again watching her son run around with the children of her friends.

Ronon smirked, “Just wait until you suggest training the children all. Then see how well they get along.” Settling down was never something Ronon Dex had seen himself doing, but he ended up that way. Though, he regularly left on missions, which he supposed was his way of not completely settling down. He and Teyla had a happy life on the mainland with their son, which Ronon had insisted on naming him as closely as he could to his own name. They had settled on Rowan, and the boy was just as independent and strong as both of his parents.

“Where are the cupcakes?!” Caitlin asked excitedly. Her long brown hair was swept up and back into a high ponytail. She was a year older than Lily and John, but acted far older. She watched as her twin, Sean, lurked around trying to find the hidden sweets as well. They were only a couple minutes apart, Caitlin being the older of the two. They lived mostly on Earth, but every now and then were given the golden opportunity of spending quality time with their father as he made the long (or how it seemed to them) journey from Earth to Atlantis and back. This was one of those times.

Marie laughed, “They’re hidden! You kids need to eat something solid before you have sweets like that…”

Carson sat on a rock as he watched the bunch play. It brought tears to his eyes thinking that Elizabeth and John Sheppard would never see their daughter grow up as he was seeing her and his son grow up. How beautiful she was turning every day. How she and John were best friends with Rowan and Aubrey McKay. He knew that they had all been friends, so why not their children as well?

The next generation.

He just hoped that what he saw now was how things would be. The children of members of the Atlantis Expedition, the Daedalus crew, and the Odyssey crew. They were his hope for a better future. Though, he just hoped that he could ensure that they would all be there for that future. His eyes fell on Lily. He was the one he needed to save.

Lily still had the virus that her mother had passed onto her when she was just a fetus. But unlike Elizabeth, Carson had been able to keep Lily well longer. But there still wasn’t a cure. All he had been doing was extending her life and making her comfortable. He watched as she dodged around the boys trying to make it to the tree in their game, the smile on her face made his heart ache. What if she was lost as well? How could he and Marie even deal with that? They had practically been her parents…it would be like losing a child… And what would that do to the children?

Most of the casualties that Atlantis had sustained had been those of unattached men and women. Though their loss had been felt, but not as deeply as when John Sheppard had been lost with his team.

“Everyone to the jumper!!!”

The scream broke Carson out of his reverie, and he saw the person who had let out the cry. It was Rodney. He squinted trying to figure out what his friend was shouting about. Looking up at the sky, he saw that there wasn’t a dark cloud in the sky. What else could the man be going on about? It was a beautiful day.

He waved everyone in the direction that they had parked the jumper. “The Wraith are on their way!” he shouted

That sent everyone into gear. Marie immediately rounded up all of the children and quickly moved them towards the jumper. “Teyla! What about Rowan?” Marie asked.

Teyla nodded, “Please! Take as many of the children with you as you can!” she said trying to calm her people and get them together in an orderly fashion.

This was not the first time they had dealt with the Wraith coming to ‘check-up’ on them, and they all knew the drill, but when the children were on the mainland it made everyone a little on edge. Teyla made sure that all of the youngest went back to Atlantis first with Rodney, Carson, and Marie. More jumpers would be coming for the rest of the Athosians and transporting them to Atlantis until the threat of the Wraith was gone.


2018 ~ Atlantis

“Hold the door!” Carson yelled. He turned and tried to move all of the children and his medical staff farther into the medical bay. Marie had stayed with him also, trying to keep the children calm. They moved everyone to the farthest part of the medical bay that could be secured. But Carson knew ultimately it was no use. Lily was in serious pain, and with the Wraith knocking literally at their door there was nothing he could do pinned in the area they were in. He also knew that since the Wraith had gotten as far as they could that they had had to have killed all the security and personnel that had been placed between the medical bay and every other section in order to get to them. His attention turned back towards his wife as he heard her whispering a prayer.

“Dad…” Lily whispered looking up at him. She was in pain and everything seemed fuzzy, but it hardly matched the fear she was feeling inside and from everyone she was crammed in with. She felt his arms wrapping around her and his lips pressed to her forehead as he softly sang one of his songs that he had once told her that his mother used to sing to him when he was a child.

The door was broken down in a loud banging and then crashing. It was shortly followed by screams that broke the sounds of soft crying, praying, and the song.

A Wraith sucking the life out of her dad was the last thing that Lily Sheppard saw before her world went stark black.


Mission: Future by shannyfish
2026 ~ Atlantis

The soft light that filtered in through the blue-green ocean of Atlantica onto Atlantis. Ever since the Ancient had interfered and saved them, the city of Atlantis had been grounded back to the ocean’s floor. He had told them that they would be safe there. Safe was something that Lily wasn’t sure she believed in anymore. A technique had kept her alive for six more years, but she wasn’t sure that the technique would last longer… But that was something that no one liked to talk about. Lily had taken those six years in order to ultimately accept what may come. Death was a natural process in life. She liked Atlantis like this though, underwater…in some ways it did feel safer…and it just felt so much more beautiful to look up through the water rather just up at the sky.

“Lily, he’s looking for you. He has some test he wants to do,” Jake Emerson said walking out onto the balcony and rested up against the balcony wall staring at her. He gave her a smile, “You know this is the first place he’ll end up looking when he figures out that you’re hiding out.”

“I’m not hiding out…exactly. And which ‘he’ wants me? John? Or Grandfather?” she asked. Grandfather was what they called the Ancient who had come to save them and make them ready to save the past and then ultimately their futures. She knew that it was a toss up either way. John Beckett was already well on the path of becoming a doctor, he had been reading his father’s journals and the medical journals along with learning the ancient medical technology. John would be looking for her to see if any of her levels were off, while Grandfather would probably wan to check to see if some new treatment would cure the Wraith virus that still plagued her.

“Grandfather,” Jake verified. “He even has those wrinkly lines on his forehead,” he told her motioning to his forehead to emphasis.

“He’s had those worry lines ever since he arrived…I think we only make it worse,” Lily said turning to look at him.

“We? More like you.”

Lily smiled brightly, “Hey now… I’m not the only one that causes trouble.”

“You’re not out here with your bunny, are you?” he asked cautiously letting his smirk slip. He let out a groan when he received a soft punch to the gut. “Ow…”

“I’m not four anymore…”

A soft chuckle came from the doorway, “Could have surprised me,” Rowan taunted. He shook his head. “I don’t know how either of you can stand out here…it’s just creepy,” he commented before looking up towards the ocean.

Lily smirked at him, “Jake, is it just me or is Rowan scared?”

Eyes narrowing and his cheeks tightened at the taunt, “I’m just cautious.”

Glancing at one another before back at Rowan, they both commented at the same time, “Scared.”

“Children!” came the familiar call and tone, which brought one response from the children on the balcony, rolled eyes and groans. A minute later, the man they all referred to as Grandfather. He was an old man, in his late seventies in Earth years, with white receding hair. His eyes were brown that were dark against his light pallor. He was dressed in a simple white outfit, one which he wore at all times. It was one of the things that he held onto from his times with his people. He clapped his hands together trying to get their attentions, since that seemed to be harder and harder to do as they became older. “Only three here, is it?” he asked looking around to make sure he wasn’t missing any. “That means nine more must be located.”

“Why?” Jake asked raising his eyebrows. Usually gathering all twelve of them meant mass chaos, power outage, and possibly putting the city of Atlantis in danger of being crushed by the ocean water that was being kept at bay by the shield. It wasn’t their fault though, what did he expect with teenagers who tended to be bored?

Lily sighed and crossed her arms over her chest, “We haven’t even done anything…” she told him and then added quietly so only Jake could hear, “Yet.” It wasn’t like he needed to question them all and figure out who had been stupid enough to do something so chaotic.

“All will be explained in time. Now we must find the others…” he told them. “Come. Come.”

“Why?” Lily asked as the three teens filed out and back into Atlantis.

“All will be explained in time.”

With groans, the three followed unhappily behind him.


2026 ~ Atlantis

“It is time my children,” Grandfather spoke softly to the twelve he had finally located. They were all gathered in front of the Stargate, all lined up. “I will miss you all, but you are all truly ready for what you must do.” He looked at them all silently for a minute. “You have all been trained well in our technology and I know you all will do well in your mission.”
Lily looked down; this had been something that she had been dreading. Things in her life had changed so drastically over the several years they had been raised by Grandfather. Concepts she had about her life had been altered…and she would be out of his care. Grandfather had been the one who had managed to keep her alive for this long, what if when they started this mission she would lull back into an ill state. She didn’t really remember it, but she really didn’t want to either.

“Bundle your belongings, only those which you completely require,” Grandfather went on. “Meet me back in the ship room in one hour. There we will be saying our farewells. Prepare yourselves.” That was all Grandfather had to say, and he was not one that would stand around just staring, once he had said what he needed, he promptly exited the area.

“Freaky…” Delaney Richards mumbled and then crossed her arms immediately allowing herself to slouch. Grandfather wasn’t found of how they held themselves, so most of those who tended to slouch had trained themselves to stand up straight with arms at their sides when he was around. “I don’t even remember my mother… I just remember her quarters on the Odyssey… There was this picture, a moonlit sky…shining over these beautiful trees that looked blue and white in the moonlight and there was a river running between them. I always wondered if that was where she was from…”

Ashley shrugged, “Probably just some random picture to make it look more ‘homey’,” she offered. “I don’t remember anything about my dad’s quarters…”

Lily frowned, “I don’t remember my parents at all…” Feeling an arm wrap around her, Lily looked up to see John Beckett standing there.

“Don’t worry, Lil, I’ll be there,” he told her with a smile and a light squeeze. “C’mon let’s go get ready…”

Memories were something that Lily didn’t seem to have as much of as the others. John seemed to remember all kinds of things…and she remembered the Becketts and their courage, how they tried to save them from the Wraith. And she remembered their screams… But nothing of her parents…just that there was always Carson or Marie. Marie’s lullaby, she remembered the melody, but that was all…not the words. But she remembered something about an angel…in heaven. Marie was always talking about angels…


2026 ~ Atlantis

“We look like clones,” Caitlin Caldwell mumbled pulling at the grey fabric. They all wore the same basic outfit. “They’re like clone uniforms…” Black boots, grey pants, black belt, and grey jackets…and depending on the specialty, either white, blue, or a red shirt. Each one had a surname embroidered on the left front chest panel, a flag representing their parent’s country on their left shoulder, and their parent’s assignment patch on the right. Caitlin and Sean Caldwell were the only ones though with their first initial before their surname. A United States of America flag decorated one shoulder, while the symbol for the Daedalus. She and Sean both were in blue, they were experts, they had mastered Atlantis’ systems when they were ten and could figure out how to re-route things almost as easily as Aubrey McKay could. Unlike their father, General Steven Caldwell, neither twin wanted anything to do with command.

Of the twelve only three wore red shirts, one from each unit had been given a red shirt. Lillian Sheppard would follow in her mother’s footsteps and was the designated leader of the Atlantis unit, even though she was the youngest; she was a master at conceiving and putting into action plans of destruction and chaos. Jeff Tripp was who had been chosen for Daedalus, he was in the middle for that unit, but was one who used his natural finesse and charm to get what he needed done. As for the Odyssey, Jake Emerson was just a natural fit and would also follow in his parent’s footsteps.

Blue shirts represented the scientific and engineer oriented ones in the units. Aubrey McKay and Rowan Dex for Atlantis, Aubrey was experienced with the power regulation, while Rowan knew how to sabotage and fix systems. Sean Caldwell, Caitlin Caldwell, and Acaisha Shaw for Daedalus, Caitlin and Sean teamed up working in tandem working the systems while Acaisha was a master of codes. Sovonn Miller, Delaney Richards, and Ashley Crosse for the Odyssey, Sovonn was familiar with the Odyssey and Daedalus layouts while Delaney and Ashley were well trained in those ships’ systems and operations.

John Beckett was the only one that did any medical, between Grandfather and John, the minor injuries and Lily’s condition had been treated just fine over the past years. So, why else would they need a second or third medic?

Grandfather walked before them, his presence making everyone tense up and straighten. “You are all ready for this… You must teach them about what happened and how they need to prevent it from becoming a reality. You have the responsibility to save them and ultimately yourselves.” He nodded towards the ship, “Lily, you will be in charge of flying the ship and giving this,” he said pulling out a small flat piece of metal and handing it to her, “This will explain everything to those on Atlantis in the time you will be heading…” He wasn’t one for goodbyes, these children had merely been a mission for him and he really didn’t have much of a connection for them. He was more concerned about the fate of Atlantis and their ability to truly save the future…that included the Ancients.

They all just stood there in silence. Bags were all lined up by the jumper. Silence filled the ship room as they all just stared at Grandfather. Lillian guessed the same thing or close to it was going through everyone’s heads, that they would be leaving behind the only real home and family they all knew and remembered. Home would be vastly different as they ventured farther back in time… What would be waiting out there for them? What would they face? Would they live long enough to see the future they all wanted exist.

“Into the ship,” Grandfather instructed.

Jeff and Jake started off immediately with their groups, but Lily just watched them. The hatch of the puddle jumper opening and welcoming them aboard. But she wasn’t ready to leave, what did the future hold for her? It seemed that everything she knew for sure was all here in this time and now she was being asked to trust in parents who didn’t even know they existed or love them in a past that she was unsure of where they’d even end up. When she felt a hand on her arm and then slowly go down to her hand and squeeze it lightly, she looked up to see John standing there smiling at her. She hated that smile, John Beckett had this confident smile, and confidence in life was something that he always seemed to have. Unlike her.

“It’s time to go,” he told her and started to herd her towards the jumper with Aubrey and Rowan along side them.

Lily tried to calm down, but leaving her comfort zone wasn’t something she had been too found of. She saw that Jake was waiting at the bottom of the jumper ramp. Rowan had already loaded the Atlantis groups’ bags into the jumper and all that was needed was for them all to get inside. Lily looked back at Grandfather, but he just turned her back to them and left.

“C’mon,” Jake told her pulling her inside and pressing a kiss to her forehead. “It’ll all be okay.”

Jake was one of the others with the confidence boost. Lily just nodded a bit as she headed for the pilot’s seat. She knew as soon as they got into the air that everything would be okay. She would level and her mind would be on the mission. Taking the jumper up and out she headed out of the atmosphere and towards the stars.

The jumper was modified, specially brought to them. The Ancients had designed it for time travel, but it was basically overall the same as the rest of the jumpers, though the kids had adjusted a few things on it and named it Jumper One NE. The NE stood for New Edition.

“Everyone let’s get into place,” Jake said making sure everyone was where they were supposed to be and everything was stowed. He knew Lily was nervous and he wanted to make it as easy as possible for her.

Lily moved the jumper into position before initialing the time travel systems. Grandfather had imputing all the information for the time they would be going to. They were simply to jump backwards, and then take the jumper home and go from there.


The Past Meets the Future by shannyfish
Author's Notes:
Sorry it’s taken so long for me to add!!! My brain’s decided to go on vacation without permission! But hopefully it’ll kick back in and let me continue to add quickly to my fanfics!
2006 ~ Above Atlantica

Once they had jumped ahead, they had stayed in orbit of Atlantis. They had even been hailed by Atlantis, but no one had responded. The group had just sat there staying quiet, mainly just taking in that they were to start what they had worked all their lives to complete their mission. But meeting their parents all over again would be difficult, or at least it seemed like it. Some were excited, but others weren’t. And Lily was one with mixed feelings. She wasn’t too sure about seeing her biological parents, but she did miss Marie and Carson badly. Those had been her parents in her heart for so long…she was almost scared to meet and experience her actual parents.

*Please identify yourself.*

It was getting old, but Lily supposed it was better than them sending up a drone or some other sad excuse to try to blow them up. In this time, Atlantis was so different; it was on the water…Lily was far too used to it being underneath Atlantica’s vast ocean. “This is getting old,” she mumbled.

“Just speak up, Lily,” Acaisha pushed a bit. “At least then maybe they’ll stop radioing us. It’ll at least give us some time…” She sighed and fixed her hair, it was a bad habit. When she was nervous she’d fix her ponytail until finally she ended up with a headache from having it too tight. Acaisha was far too excited and though she couldn’t wait to land, she knew the others needed time. And she’d give them that. After all, she being one of the eldest, it fell on her shoulders to look out for the younger ones.

Lily looked back at Acaisha nervously and then over at Jeff sitting next to her. When she received nods from the others, she opened communications. It was only communications, after all. It didn’t mean she had to continue talking or land yet. She still had time. “This is PJ 1 NE. I repeat, this is Papa Juliet One November Echo.” She had broken it down into phonetics hoping that maybe it would take them longer to respond.”


2006 ~ Atlantis

“PJ1NE?” John Sheppard questioned trying to put the letters and number into some sense. “That’s not a very good name for a ship.”

“It’s a jumper,” Rodney cut in quite annoyed. “PJ,” he responded shaking his head, “Puddle. Jumper.”

“And the NE?”

Elizabeth shook her head, “Does it really matter why they’re using that as their designation? I think it’s more important to find out /why/ they have one, where they’re from, and who they are…” She directed her attention back to the monitors. She supposed that at least they could take in a breath of relief that it wasn’t the Wraith.

“What do you suggest?” Rodney opened his mouth full of sarcasm, “We should invite them down to tea?”

Ignoring him, Elizabeth continued to think, “Can you tell me how many are in the jumper?” she asked one of the techs sitting nearby at a laptop.

“Twelve, Ma’am,” he responded.

Nodding, Elizabeth noted it, “Open a channel.” When she got a nod from the tech, she started speaking. “Jumper 1 NE, this is Weir. We’d like to learn more—”

“Ma’am! The jumper’s descending at a sharp erratic rate!” the tech shouted.


2006 ~ Puddle Jumper 1 NE

“Lillian, breathe,” John prompted. He had dragged Lily from the pilot’s chair and forced her to break her mental lock with the jumper. Instead, Jeff took over as pilot and Sean slipped in as co-pilot. Pulling the clips from her hair, he set them down on the bench and then started to run his fingers along her scalp through her brown rings of hair. “It’ll be okay. I’m going to be there the whole time. We all are.” This was one thing that John had feared, that Lily would snap. Atlantis with Grandfather was what they were used to, and he knew Lily’s stress level had sky rocket-ed when he had told them that they would be going on their mission. She had started this low humming between them. He blamed their ATA gene and closeness on that. Either that or they just had a tele-empathic bond. Once she started to calm, he thrust forward a water bottle into her hand.

When John had broken Lily’s mental contact with the jumper, the jumper had dropped from it’s stationary orbit and had started almost a dive, but Jeff had gotten it to slow and the slope leveled out. With Sean’s help, they managed to stop the jumper from going headfirst into the ocean. Instead, had been able to maneuver into the roof and land in the jumper bay. Breathing heavily in relief, the two teens looked at each other before breaking into wide smiles. “Pretty cool,” Sean commented.

“Pretty crazy,” Jeff agreed.

Rowan leaned up between the two seats, directing his comment directly at the younger two, “We are /not/ doing that again.”


Shaking her head, Caitlin got up following Acaisha to the back of the jumper. Looking briefly over at Lily and John, she gave John a small smile when she saw he had gotten her to calm down. “Let’s unpack, kids!” she shouted.

“That’s so my line,” Acaisha mumbled picking up a couple bags as the puddle jumper ramp opened to form a stable ramp for her to walk down before setting her things outside. There were soldiers waiting with guns trained. Shaking her head, Acaisha shouted their way, “Don’t shoot, boys, wouldn’t look too good if you shot kids.” Turning to go back into the jumper, she added under her breath, “Even worse if you shoot your own.”

As soon as the bags were all out of the jumper, Acaisha had started to get the others into lines. All, but Caitlin, Lily, John, and Jake were out. A line was formed for Daedalus, one for Odyssey, and one for Atlantis. Acaisha watched as a small group entered the jumper bay. She recognized a couple, John Sheppard and Rodney McKay. She wasn’t sure who the woman was, but she seemed familiar. Before they could speak up, she took the chance to start, “I know you have questions,” Acaisha spoke up. “But let my friends…” she started and then picked her next words wisely. “Have another minute before we start.” When the woman nodded, Acaisha gave her a smile before moving back between Jeff and Sean.

“Lily, it’ll all be okay…” Jake promised. “I’ll even hold your hand if it makes you feel better,” he told her helping her up. He hated seeing Lily freak out, it was just as bad as when she was sick. It wasn’t the Lily he knew and loved. And sometimes that scared him.

A small smile came to her face, and Lily wiped the tears from her eyes. “Hold my hand, eh?” On her tip toes, she kissed Jake’s cheek, “Thanks…” she whispered. “But I think I’m better now…”

John pushed a new bottle of water into her hand, “Keep this.”

Caitlin gave Lily a bright smile, “C’mon…it’ll be fun to watch the clueless parentals.” Pulling Lily by the hand, she managed to get her friend out of the jumper and the group walked out to join the others. Jake was the first to move away and take the front of the far line on the right, while Caitlin walked to the middle group head only letting go when Lily took her place beside her at the head of the left hand group with John right behind her.


2006 ~ Atlantis Jumper Bay

Smiling at the group before her, Elizabeth couldn’t help but notice how young they all were, but they wore similar uniforms….her smile dropped as she moved closer to one of the lines and managed to read the name on the front. It shocked her and she couldn’t help, but stare.

Sheppard frowned, Elizabeth was quiet, he moved forward and put his hand on his shoulder, “You okay?”

Caitlin couldn’t help, but grin. “It’s pronounced Cald-well,” Caitlin spoke up.

“I know,” Elizabeth responded finally. “Are you related to Steven Caldwell?”

She shrugged a bit, “You could put it that way.”

Sheppard stayed close a bit weary that Elizabeth had practically frozen up like that and then just the plain creepiness he was currently feeling. He almost wanted to ask if he was the only one. He glanced over at the other line and then frowned. Why was his name on one of the jackets? He didn’t like this at all. But he’d bring that up and the Sheppard girl later. Hearing the hiss of the doors, he looked quickly over his shoulder to see Teyla, Ronan, and Carson enter. “What are you guys doing here?”

“You called for us,” Ronan responded.


“Aye, ya did, Lad,” Carson responded.

Teyla walked up to join Elizabeth, “Lantian children?” she asked, even though their apparel didn’t seem to express that heritage. It wasn’t often since her people had moved to the mainland did they have children on Atlantis, but these were older children, almost adults, if not some of them already at that stage.

“I don’t know yet,” Elizabeth responded looking back at Teyla. Looking back at the three lines of four, she tilted her head slightly, “They’re being awfully problematic…”

“We prefer ‘challenging’,” Jake spoke up. “Problematic is usually a term we use when there’s mass chaos…” He smiled at her briefly before going back to staring straight forward again.

“Where are you from?” Elizabeth tried, hoping from a straight answer.

Lily stepped forward not looking at the woman, “Our ancestors are what you call Ancients,” she spoke quietly. “We all carry what you call the ATA gene.” She avoided eye contact with anyone looking at her; she just concentrated at a spot on the wall. “We are entrusted to you,” Lily continued before breaking away from her spot on the wall and looking directly at the woman. She knew who she was, and Lily also knew that she couldn’t ignore her. “Doctor Weir.” Reaching into her pocket, she pulled out the small flat metal item that Grandfather had given her. “We are from the future, and I am to give this to you…it explains everything,” she said as she walked towards Weir, her hand open and out offering the item. But when Sheppard stepped in front of her, she jumped and took two steps back.

John studied her, and then tried to grab the metal from her hand that reminded him of some kind of woman’s compact. “I just want to look at it. Make sure it’s safe.”

“It’s safe,” Lily told him closing her hand and pulling back so that he couldn’t take it from her.

Frowning, he glared slightly, “And why does your jacket say ‘Sheppard’ on it? And who said you could steal puddle jumper? I so trademarked it.”

Elizabeth moved quickly between Sheppard and the girl, not wanting him to scare her. “It says Sheppard?” she asked hearing the last part as she stood between them.

“You’re paranoid,” Lily shot at Sheppard. Placing the metal item back on her palm, she spoke in Ancient, just briefly before the metal fluttered open like a flower and a hologram appeared on the platform of Grandfather.

“Doctor Elizabeth Weir, as I’m sure my children have already informed you, they are from the future. These precious children are entrusted to you, as your people are their parents. They are the key to making the future safe for us all. They are the key to destroying the Wraith. Treat them well. Cherish them.”

With that, the hologram of Grandfather disappeared and the metal petal-like pieces folded back until it was flat. Lily just glared at Sheppard before taking her place back at the head of her line and placing the object back into her pocket where it would be safe. How could Grandfather had thought that these ‘parents’ would be able to care for them and ultimately save the future?

Wrap Your Brain Around This! by shannyfish
Author's Notes:
Okay, so I’m really supposed to be working on RPG posts, but Atlantis plotlines are haunting my brains and not letting me focus on my RPG-ness…so I’m trying to appease my brain so that I can continue ;) So, if this is short or…a bit silly…I blame that.
2006 ~ Atlantis Medical Bay

Lillian lay on her side with her eyes closed on one of the beds. Her jacket pulled tightly to her chest, her fingers still slightly pulling at the fabric.

A few feet away from Lily Sheppard, Carson studied the chart that he had started for her. He had confirmed her paternity. She was indeed the daughter of John Sheppard. He wasn’t too thrilled though when he found that she was sick with a condition that seemed to be terminal. It was frustrating, he had tried to figure out what exactly it was, but he was coming up with a blank.

“She doesn’t like it here,” John Beckett whispered as he walked up behind his father. He sighed as he looked at Lily just lying there, “Lily was born with a condition. Her mother had it, she had been attacked by Wraith and while the Wraith was trying to drain the life out of her they ended up transferring some kind of virus, which ended up being genetically transferred to Lily when she was born. We never came up with a cure…”

“We?” Carson questioned, his accent thick. He noticed that he really couldn’t hear an accent coming from his son, perhaps he had lost it.

Nodding, John sighed, “Between you, me, and Grandfather.”


A smile plastered across John’s face, “I may only be sixteen, Dad, but I know how to read. I read all of your medical files… I learned Lantian techniques and how to use their equipment and databases, but Lily’s still sick. Grandfather at least was able to stabilize her.”


“Well, we’ve used nanites to try to stop the Wraith virus from attacking her cells, but that only works for so long. You have to change tactics. We’ve used nanites in her bloodstream and her water. Like that water bottle,” he said nodding to the clear bottle lying next to Lily on the bed. He sighed, “She’s running a temperature, isn’t she?” John questioned and when his father nodded, he added, “Lily’s becoming immune to that therapy…”

“Her mother?” Carson questioned wanting to know if perhaps her mother was already infected with the Wraith virus and perhaps he had just missed it. After all, this was something entirely new to him, usually the Wraith tried to kill people and when they didn’t succeed then they’d just leave them weak and aged.

John looked up at his father, “Maybe you should let her come around to telling you that when she’s ready…”


2006 ~ Atlantis Conference Room

Elizabeth had gathered her command staff together to discuss what was going on. Most of all she wanted to hear Carson’s report on the children. “How is your investigation coming along, Carson?”

Doctor Beckett frowned, “So far, those who’s DNA I have I have been able to match up to their father… The mothers on the other hand, they don’t seem to want to give up. So, for the most part, they are who they say they are.”

“They’re all healthy then?” Elizabeth asked.

“Not all,” Carson said a bit wearily. He was frustrated with Lillian Sheppard’s condition, his future self hadn’t been able to cure her, so how could he be expected to do so now. The Ancient that had apparently cared for them hadn’t been able to. “From what I can tell…that Ancient that popped up as a hologram took care of the wee ones for some time. I didn’t push for the whole story, but apparently Lillian Sheppard is slowly dying, she has a terminal condition. And it seems that her current therapy is no longer working.”

John’s head turned to Carson on that. Apparently the girl was his daughter, she was young, so how could she be dying? She was much too young to die. “How?”

Shrugging, Carson could only recount what he had been told. “Her mother received a virus from the Wraith and genetically passed it on to Lily when she was born… I have a feeling that her mother died from it…but I don’t know that for sure just yet.”

“Did she tell you who her mother is?” John pushed a bit. He wanted answers. John wanted to know things that he hadn’t even thought up yet, and he wanted to be able to ask his daughter those things.

“Is there nothing you can do, Doctor Beckett?” Teyla asked, her voice gentle and full of concern.

“Not that I have been able to think of…but I will keep trying…” Carson responded.

Elizabeth turned her attention to her radio, putting two fingers on the ear piece as she listened before answering, “Yes, go ahead and escort them up,” she said before turning her attention back to the group. “It seems that two of the children have asked for an audience with us.”

“Which two?” Ronan asked.

Elizabeth smiled, “Jeff Tripp and Jake Emerson. None of those I recognize as Atlantis.”

“You’re right,” Carson spoke up. “Emerson is the son of the CO of the Odyssey…he told me all about it when I examined him. He’s a bright young lad. And I believe Tripp belongs with the Daedalus crew.”

“What? No representative from Atlantis?” McKay spoke up, his voice slightly irritated. “What about my daughter…I have a daughter right?” he asked his last question directed to Carson.

“Aye. Aubrey McKay. A sweet lass.”

“I think they’re sending us their leaders,” Elizabeth spoke up. “And I think Lily is Atlantis’. She was at the front of one of the lines…” It was all too much to take in, but she forced her brain to take in that they’d be dealing with two children in a matter of minutes.

The doors slid open and the two young men stepped in. One was taller than the other, his head full of bright red hair and shining blue eyes, his jacket read Tripp. “Jeff Tripp,” he introduced with a nod.

While the other slightly shorter one had a slightly tanner pallor complete with a set of brown eyes and short brown hair. He shoved his hands in his pockets and studied the group, “I’m Jake Emerson.”

“How can we help you?” Elizabeth asked.

Jeff looked directly at her, “We wish to do what we were sent here to do. To save Atlantis, the Daedalus, the Odyssey…the other ships…the mainland on Atlantica…Earth. But you have to let us do it. You can’t treat us like children. We’ve been raised by Grandfather, primed to try and save the future…your future. But we can’t do that if you don’t let us.”

“How can we trust you?” Ronan spoke up eyeing the boys.

“We’re trusting you,” Jake spoke up. “Lily is dying… We’re trusting your doctor to care for her and not make things worse.” He turned his gaze from Ronan to Carson and then rested on Elizabeth. “We’re also trusting you not to hand us over to the SGC and the various agencies on Earth who would find us entertaining to lock up into cells and try to interrogate us.”

Elizabeth studied them and realized that they were right. They weren’t children. She was sure now that they weren’t truly children; they had been made to grow up too quickly. “I wouldn’t do that…I wouldn’t allow it.”

“Sometimes things are out of our hands, Doctor Weir,” Jeff replied.

“Tell us something,” she spoke knowing that John wasn’t the only one who wanted an answer. “Who is Lily’s mother?”

“You don’t know?” Jake asked somewhat surprised, yet amused.

Teyla looked at the boy oddly, “Should we?”

Jeff let out a laugh, “Oh…you’d think…but I suppose perhaps you don’t catch on so quickly…”

John studied them for a moment and thought about it. They were laughing at them almost like it was written somewhere. He had merely wanted an answer, but it seemed they’d be playing twenty questions. “Is her mother on Atlantis?”

“Of course…” Jeff responded.

Jake couldn’t help, but find it amusing as they all seemed to be thinking about it. “You can’t tell by her mannerisms? How she talks? Her eyes?” He had never met Lily’s mother, but he had known Elizabeth Weir right when they had gotten there merely by her eyes…she and Lily shared those.

Teyla knew who it was when she thought back to when Lily had talked about where they came from, it had just hit her. “She is John…and Elizabeth’s daughter,” she spoke up.

“Mine?” Elizabeth asked just as John’s chair tipped backwards sending him sprawling backwards and creating a huge crash. She didn’t move to help John until she saw Jake and Jeff nod. Only then, did she assist John, who was already being helped up by Rodney and Carson.

“My-mine and Elizabeth?” John barely managed to get out.

“Yep,” Jeff affirmed.

Carson looked over at Elizabeth, “I’ll be needing to check you out just to make sure you don’t have the virus then.”

“She shouldn’t,” Jake interrupted, “Not yet…”

“But to be safe,” Sheppard spoke up, “It’s good to know. Plus, maternity testing is always good.”

“Yeah, Lil’ would love to hear you denying her,” Jake mumbled.

“Excuse me?”

“Do we at least get temporary quarters where the lovely guard detail can wait outside?” Jake asked changing the subject.

Elizabeth nodded, “I’ll have some put together. You might have to bunk together.”

“We don’t mind,” Jeff responded.


2006 ~ Atlantis Medical Bay

Carefully, she lifted the hand into hers and rubbed the top of it with her thumb before moving her other hand to brush the brown hair out of her daughter’s face. That still was a lot for her to take it; it almost brought tears to her eyes at the realization that she’d be a mother… But then, this daughter was dying… Carson had hooked Lily up to oxygen and an IV; he was slowly adding more and more wires it seemed. But he had confirmed that she was Lily’s mother, but that she didn’t have the virus like Lily had.

A smile fluttered across her face as she watched Lily’s eyes slowly open and then close again, “Hi there,” she greeted. Elizabeth had hoped that she’d wake up before she had to go. There was a mission briefing she needed to attend, but she had told herself that she’d stay with Lily as long as possible.

Her mother was looking down at her, which had not been something that Lily remembered or had ever dreamed of seeing. Her eyes were a bright green, and her smile was gentle. “Mother?” she whispered weakly before realizing that this woman wasn’t her mother, at least not yet… She hadn’t meant to tell her mother or father, but her father had been able to read and that had given it away very quickly.

“You’re safe,” she assured running her hand along Lily’s cheek. “Carson’s going to try to help you. Make you better…”

“John,” Lily said immediately looking around for him. He was usually there when she woke up if she was sick… But where was he?

“Your father?” Elizabeth questioned.

Shaking her head, Lily clarified, “John Beckett…” Things were complicated, and she wasn’t sure that they wanted to tell them everything… Though, they wanted to change the future, so perhaps it would help.

“Ah, Carson’s son,” Elizabeth said with a smile. “He’s with the others. They’re in quarters, resting. He’s been here for hours… I practically had to have him dragged off, it was that or Carson was going to sedate him.”

Lily tilted her head a bit as she forced herself to sit up. “Why are you being so nice to me?” she questioned, she had expected a more hostile response…paranoid, and more closed off than her mother was showing towards her. Reaching for her water bottle, she frowned when she saw it was empty. Somehow she didn’t see them letting her walk to the jumper to get a new one.

“What do you mean?”

“You don’t have to be nice to me… Technically you’re not my mom… You never raised me, I wouldn’t have even known you if I hadn’t seen a picture before. You died when I was two. Carson and his wife raised me,” she explained trying to show her mother that she didn’t have to be so nice or motherly towards her.

Elizabeth smiled a bit more, “You sound like you’re trying to get rid of me.”

“You don’t want to get attached to me… I’ll due to die…” Lily said, her voice calm and wholly accepting of her fate.

A frown replaced her smile, “Don’t talk like that.”

“It’s true.”

“You know who you sound like? Your father,” Elizabeth said shaking her head. She had heard John accepting his fate of dying on many occasions and his calm voice. Lily was like that. “But you’re strong, you’re going to fight it, and Carson is going to find a cure. You have to believe in that.”

Lily nodded a bit and relaxed against the pillow, “I believe in Carson,” she whispered before letting her eyes slide closed. She was tired, more so of arguing than overall tired.


Avoiding Can't Go On Forever by shannyfish
2006 ~ Atlantis

“She’s absolutely brilliant,” Rodney praised, making everyone in the lab raise their eyebrows. He guided his daughter, Aubrey, along and found her a chair to sit in. “With you here, it’s double the McKay power.”

Aubrey just sat and watched him quietly. When was she supposed to mention that her father and his brilliance marveled and yet scared her? Her father knew how to blow up things and tended to boost his own ego. She was far from being in his shadow. Sure, things in his field came easily to her, but she tended to be quiet and introverted rather than announce things. At the moment she wished she could be whisked away by Rowan or Caitlin or anyone else. This was embarrassing let alone painful.

“Rodney, how’s it coming with the jumper?” John asked walking into the lab figuring the scientists would be hard at work trying to figure out the Puddle Jumper One NE.

Her eyes darted back and forth between her father and John Sheppard. “What jumper?” she questioned. “Hopefully not the NE…that’s just flat out stupid. You don’t think it’s just sitting there without any type of protection against stupid people, do you?” Aubrey rolled her eyes, “We’re smarter than that.” When she saw Sheppard and her father open their mouths, she added for good measure, “And I’m not helping you override it.” She wasn’t sure what to feel about them wanting to get into the NE, but she felt the need to leave. They didn’t even have a chance to argue. She was up and out the door before they could say anything or stop her.

One good thing about growing up on Atlantis was that she knew where all the hidden passages where and she probably knew more about the city than her father did. But then she wouldn’t tell him that… Making her way away from the lab, she retreated to one of the places she usually met up with Lily. But the moment the panel fell into the room and she noticed who was looking back at her, she realized just why Lily was so attracted to that room… Slightly embarrassed, she crawled out of the passage and replaced the panel. Standing up and straightening out her shirt, she tried to apologize, “Sorry to intrude…I…uh…well…” Aubrey sighed, “Usually when I’m having problems, so is Lily…and we meet up here… I didn’t take into account who might be here, now…”

Elizabeth smiled, “Its okay. Your secret is safe with me.” She sat at her desk watching the young girl. She was beautiful and obviously seemed more able to deal with things, but then maybe that was just because she was so quiet. “Lily’s in the medical bay,” Elizabeth said.

Aubrey nodded, “I know. I saw her earlier… She doesn’t like it in there.” She looked down and pulled her long blonde hair to one side and started to twist it and fidget with it. “Lily doesn’t like it here though at all…”

Frowning, Elizabeth nodded, “I noticed that.”

“Are you going to take care of us?” Aubrey asked looking up at the woman. She had heard a lot about her from what John had told her from the logs in the database. She seemed like a good enough woman…why not trust her? “In our future. The Wraith came. They destroyed Atlantis, Earth…galaxies… They tried to kill us, but the Ancients interfered. They didn’t save all the children…only a handful.” She wanted to illustrate what could happen…what would happen if they didn’t do anything.

“We don’t want that future to happen anymore than you,” Elizabeth tried to assure her.

“Prove it,” Aubrey said almost regretting how defiant she sounded the minute she blurted it out. Normally she wouldn’t say something bold, especially not in that tone or loud enough for anyone to hear it. But her normally shy and quiet nature had to be put aside when her friend’s life was at stake.

Tilting her head a bit as she leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest, Elizabeth studied the girl reliving the past couple of seconds trying to figure out if she had heard what she had thought she had. “Excuse me?” she questioned wondering if she had the girl completely wrong. She thought herself normally a good judge of people and their personalities.

Flustered by the fact that Doctor Weir had actually heard her, Aubrey looked down and tried to clear her head thinking about what she was going to say. “I said…prove it,” she repeated quietly. She started to twist her blonde locks again nervously as she stared down at the floor. She could feel Doctor Weir’s eyes on her, but she didn’t feel the need to look the woman directly.

“And how might I prove it?” she asked quizzically. Elizabeth had to admit she even wanted to know how she could prove that she didn’t want the future that had been described thus far in bits and pieces…not even in full sentences. Leaning forward in her desk, she watched Aubrey. “You know you don’t have to be scared of me…” Elizabeth added a bit more gentle and quiet.

Looking up suddenly, Aubrey blurted, “I’m not scared of you,” before quickly covering her mouth as her eyes widened. For some reason her brain was not behaving. “You have to convince her…” she tried to explain. “Convince Lily not to want to die…”

Elizabeth blinked, “Lily…/wants/ to die?” That was a bit of a shock to her, but then she hadn’t really had much time to talk to her new found daughter. But then Aubrey would know Lily better than she would. And she had no reason to lie.

“Not so much /wants/, but accepts it… She’s not fighting,” Aubrey told her. “We can’t do it without Lily… Eleven doesn’t work as well as twelve.” Aubrey didn’t feel like explaining and suddenly wished she could communicate what she wanted to explain more completely through telepathy…but she didn’t possess that ability. “We need everyone to save the future.”

“And how am I supposed to make Lily fight the virus?” Elizabeth asked wondering why Lily would even listen to her. Her own daughter didn’t seem to want anything to do with her. They had been like complete strangers in the infirmary… She had somehow pictured a smile and warm conversation, but it had been the complete opposite, but then Lily had said she had died when Lily was so young…

Aubrey stepped closer feeling the need to close the distance to make her point. Placing her hands on the desk, she leaned in a bit before speaking quietly, “Be a mother to her… That’s all she needs. A family… We’re all family to each other, but we all need parents…even if it’s an extended family.”

Be a mother? Elizabeth wasn’t even sure if she could do that. She had been an only child and she didn’t see how any of her experiences in life could help her in this situation. The closest she had come to being a mother was with Sedge. Did having a dog and caring for it count as being a mother? She wasn’t sure, but she knew that she wasn’t the only one who needed to want the relationship. How could she even start being a mother to Lily if she wouldn’t even talk to her?

“Talk to Carson,” Aubrey said before turning and leaving.

She had just been thinking how she could get closer to Lily when Aubrey had spoken. With wide eyes, she watched as Aubrey left wondering if the girl had telepathic abilities. Carson hadn’t reported anything like that, but it was possible he could have missed it. Elizabeth made a mental note to ask him later. “Be a mother,” she repeated lowly aloud to herself as she thought it over.


John had been trying to keep himself occupied with things to do all day. One of his missions for the day had been avoiding Elizabeth; he wasn’t exactly ready to discuss their ‘daughter’ and ‘future relationship’. Not that he didn’t want either…he was just confused. It was one thing to want something and it was another to have something thrown at you. A daughter was something that John hadn’t thought about having anytime soon, especially not one that was a teenager.

As he walked along the hallways of Atlantis just thinking, he suddenly found himself in the medical bay. He hadn’t meant to go there, but for some reason when his brain was supposed to be on auto pilot for his quarters he had ended up there instead. Walking in cautiously, he looked around seeing no one catching his appearance in the medical bay; he slipped further in towards where Lily was being treated. Peeking past the curtain, he was surprised to see that not only was Lily lying there unconscious, but Elizabeth was sitting by her side as well.

He wasn’t ready. But would he ever be? Suddenly being thrown into this future situation was something that took getting used to. Having a relationship with his commanding officer, even though she wasn’t military wasn’t exactly normal etiquette. Sighing quietly, he grabbed a chair and rolled it up along side Elizabeth and sat down with the back of the chair against his chest and his legs straddling the sides.

Elizabeth didn’t need to look to see who it was, she knew. She knew eventually he’d come out of hiding and talk to her. It was only a matter of time. “Avoiding me?” she asked sighing and setting her empty coffee cup on the medical tray nearby.

“Of course not.”


John frowned, “Okay…maybe I was.” He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, “Maybe…I can see it happen,” he said a bit quietly avoiding eye contact. “I mean, it’s not like they were married and having a kid now…”

Elizabeth smiled and looked back over at Lily. “

“Am I really that scary to picture being married to, John?” she asked looking at him. “In the future anyway…”

He looked at her seriously, and spoke in the same manner, “Elizabeth, it’s not a scary picture at all. That wasn’t the reason behind my avoiding. I just…felt uncomfortable… I mean, it’s not exactly a relationship that’s really proper.”

“I don’t think the SGC expects us to have loveless lives forever,” Elizabeth replied. “You can’t choose who you love, John. And you can’t choose who loves you back… Some people are meant to be soul mates, and yet fate is cruel and puts road blocks in our way. Why is it so wrong?”

John’s eyebrows rose, “So, are you encouraging this?”

Elizabeth shrugged, “I say let fate just…happen. Things happen when they happen.” Of course, at times, she didn’t like how life ended up, but she knew that you had to be positive that life would turn around and good things would come later.

“You do realize that you’re never leaving Atlantis ever again…” John said casually.

That was a surprise, “John…”

“Carson explained why Lily is so sick… That you get attacked by a Wraith... You think I’m gonna allow that to happen?” he asked looking at her. John Sheppard was a protector and there was no way he was going to let Elizabeth be attacked by a Wraith that would end up killing her…

Shaking her head, Elizabeth looked at John, “That may or may not happen now.”

“I won’t allow it to happen.”

“John,” Elizabeth said with a sigh, “You can’t protect me forever.”

“I can try.”

Elizabeth just stared at him. She wasn’t sure whether to be angry or loved by it all. Or both. She could feel it like electricity between the two of them; she had felt the spark before…but had ignored it. But could she ignore it now? Was it right to? Leaning in, Elizabeth watched as John mimicked her slow movement. Her eyes were locked with John’s as they neared closer, just inches apart. But the movement they heard made them both pull back far quickly than the way they had gotten to their previous position. She avoided eye contact and then saw where the moment had come from. Lily was awake. “Honey, how are you feeling?”

Lily just stared; she wasn’t sure how to feel that she had just almost witnessed her parents kissing… When she saw the concerned look her mother was getting, she decided it was best to say something. “I feel better,” Lily said trying to give her a small smile.


Don't Underestimate What You Don't Understand by shannyfish
Author's Notes:
So, don’t blame me for not updating other things before this…kids stories are easier for me to re-attune to.
2006 ~ Atlantis Conference Room

“I think we should take them to Earth,” Caldwell spoke up. “They know things about the future that’s supposed to keep whatever happened from happening. I say we put them to good use, and get them away from here.”

Elizabeth had her hands neatly folded on the conference table listening to what everyone had to say, but she was tired of being quiet. Most of the people there had no problems with the children being there. “I’m not prepared to do that. If they want to participate in something like that, then I leave it up to them.”

“They don’t have rights, Doctor Weir. Technically they don’t even exist. They may wear flags of countries on their arms, but they don’t hold any rights of any of those respective nations,” Caldwell argued.

Teyla tilted her head studying Caldwell for a moment before speaking up, “You would force your children to do something which they do not wish?”

Caldwell turned his attention to Teyla, “As you say, they’re children. They don’t know what they want.”

“I think you’ll find that’s far from the truth, Colonel,” Kate Heightmeyer spoke up. She had interviewed a good number of the children, discussing the impacts of them being there and being with parents that weren’t their parents, not yet anyways… “Your daughter in fact, amazes me at how much she knows about life and the world. You’re very lucky to have such a well spoken and versed daughter at only seventeen. And it seems she’s even followed in your footsteps, she’s seems quite the leader even if she’s not the lead Daedalus representative.”

A smirk formed on Caldwell’s face, “You talk as if these children are ours here and now.”

“Well they are here,” Teyla spoke up again. “Why not expect them? Carson has run tests saying that they are not lying about their parentage. They were sent to Atlantis, Colonel Caldwell if you will recall. Not Earth. They were sent here for a reason.”

Caldwell grumbled quietly and leaned back in his chair. Sometimes Atlantis politics annoyed him. He liked the normal military ranking structure, in which it would be what he said and there was no other argument. Sometimes he wondered how smart having Weir as the commander of Atlantis was. It was definitely not convenient. Though he didn’t see getting any support from any of those on Atlantis besides a couple misfits, and those he couldn’t even stand.

“Perhaps they would be helpful on missions,” Rodney spoke aloud, surprising himself even at his sediment. “I mean, cuz…ya know…two heads are better than one…and all that.”

Teyla smiled, “I believe that that would prove most interesting.”

“I don’t think it would be safe,” John said frowning. What was Rodney thinking? Was he completely insane? He didn’t want to babysit… He had just gotten out of that stage since Rodney had become more gun friendly.

“I agree with Sheppard, they don’t have any field experience. Plus, they’re kids,” Ronan chimed in not wanting to look out for the kids on the mission any more than obviously Sheppard did.

Elizabeth had her hands folded in front of her, “Maybe we should talk to them… We need to find a way to bring them all into…the fold so to speak. I’m sure they’ll get bored. Perhaps they’re willing to participate in off-world missions…or they would be more comfortable on Atlantis.”

“Perhaps on the main land,” Teyla spoke up. “We could run drills…like a mission and they can be judged on how well they would perform off-world.”

“You want me to just hand over guns to the kids?” John asked surprised. “I don’t feel like being shot at.”

Teyla looked at him oddly, “You could always train them how to use them if they do not already know before you start the drills…”


2006 ~ Mainland

The kids had been split into ‘odd groups’ as Caitlin had commented, and been assigned to different judges. Caitlin hadn’t been so happy about leaving Lily on Atlantis, but then Lily wasn’t up to any of the running around anyways. Caitlin didn’t like being separated from her twin, Sean, though…it bugged her. Usually they worked together, but they had been mixed and mashed together. And she had been stuck with Ronan Dex. That just annoyed her.

She, John, Jeff, and Delaney were all together. Not that she would complain about them being put together normally, it just pissed her off that none of them had a choice in the matter and they expected them to meet Ronan Dex’s expectations. Why not just tell them that there was no way in hell they’d let them do anything important now? Caitlin was blatantly ignoring Ronan as he went on about safety and his rules, but when she heard him give the word, he brain snapped back.


Running quickly, Caitlin looked over at Delaney, caught her eye and they nodded to each other before heading off in opposite directions. John and Jeff stayed together going straight forward. The whole idea was to ‘rescue’ some dummy on the other side of the ‘enemy compound’. Ronan wanted to hear everything that went on, but as soon as they were out of sight, they all met up and exchanged their radios for their own equipment they were used to. Caitlin wasn’t the only one with a suspicion that the adults would cheat.

Jeff drew out the markers that they needed to go by and where they had to go, he knew that Caitlin hadn’t been listening. He could tell by the glazed over look she had gotten. Caitlin and Lily did it a lot, so he had already learned to decipher that look. “Okay, so I’m thinking if we stay in groups of two, and one pair scouts up ahead a bit at a time letting the others know it’s all clear, that would be the best plan,” he announced. Jeff Tripp was used to being the lead on the Daedalus and maybe that’s why he so naturally took command of the situation, plus there were no others to conflict with him.

“Sounds good,” Delaney said brightly before pulling her long blonde hair back and up and secured it into a messy bun with an elastic band. “Though, you do realize that he’s going to report us and oh are we gonna be in trouble…”

John smiled a bit sadly, “We’re making up for Lily not being here. I’m sure she’d have come up with something like this… Except there’d be an argument before we went out…”

Caitlin nodded in agreement, “And we definitely wouldn’t have been divided like they did.”


2006 ~ Atlantis Conference Room

“They did it on purpose,” Ronan argued.

“And it was pre-meditated,” John added quickly.

Lorne smiled, leaning back in his chair, “But they’re smart. And good shots.”

John glared over at Lorne, “You’re not helping.”

“I’d say he was.”

The group turned to the door. Elizabeth frowned, “You should be in the medical bay…resting, shouldn’t you?” she asked. Her daughter wasn’t yet strong enough, she had been checking in with Carson everyday…once or twice…and then she’d go down and visit.

Lily stepped further into the room; her eyes were dark and looked sunken in. She was paler than normal, and she only took small slow steps at a time. “I heard all about what you did…” she said quietly, weakly…tiredly. “It wasn’t fair… You can’t expect us to stay in rooms coloring in books because we’re children…”

John’s stomach started to twist. She just looked horrible, he stood up and guided her towards on of the chairs, “You should sit down.” He’d have to have a word with Carson in a while. As if on cue, Carson’s voice filled his ear piece and obviously Elizabeth’s as well. He activated his radio, “Carson, she’s up here in the conference room.” Once Carson had stopped talking, he looked over at his daughter, “Carson is not happy.”

“Neither am I,” Lily spoke up. She looked over at her mother and decided it was time to plead to her, “You made us a promise… We’re supposed to help you…so let us.”


Decisions for the Future by shannyfish
Author's Notes:
I was considering making this a series with the kids, but I don’t think there’s enough interest in this story that would fuel me enough to keep it going…
2006 ~ Atlantis Conference Room

It had been a week since Lily had come to plead with the senior staff to let them help. Elizabeth hadn’t given her an answer; she had just said that they’d think things over. And she had. But it was hard, part of her wanted to protect them because they were children, but then another part of her just wanted to sit down with each one and hear their whole life story and try to learn from the mistakes that had been made. She knew that neither John nor Ronan seemed very excited about the idea, but she figured; why not give them a real chance?

“You’re in here early,” John said as he arrived early himself to the meeting with the senior staff, a bit surprised to see Elizabeth at the conference table alone. “I didn’t miss the meeting, did I? Because if I did…I have a good excuse…” He smiled before taking a seat across from her, and then noticed a couple things he hadn’t picked up when he had first entered the room. She wasn’t at the head of the table like usual…and she looked concerned…even worried… “What’s wrong?” he asked tilting his head trying to read her features.

Putting on a smile for him, she looked up towards him, “I-I’ve just been thinking… I guess I’m just torn…” she explained. “It’s a hard decision… Either way, it seems like I upset someone.”

“You’re still deciding about the kids?” he asked a bit surprised. He had thought that that had already been decided and the decision had been that the kids would not go out on missions or help in any day-to-day duties. Although DNA declared them each uniquely as children of the Atlantis Expedition, Odyssey, and Daedalus…it still didn’t seem right to him. When he saw her nod, he sighed and leaned back in his seat. “You’re thinking about what she said… Elizabeth, she’s using the fact that you’re biologically her mother against us…ya know tugging at your material strings…”

Elizabeth’s smile dropped, “John… If I were in her place…I would ask for you to be included…all of you… I think you’d go crazy otherwise… And it’s not like Lily’s asking us to put her into danger. John, the others are adults…and all they’ve been training for is this… Wouldn’t you want to complete your mission if you’d been training so hard for it?”

“But they’re children…”

Nodding, Elizabeth folded her hands together in front of her. “They’re the children of our senior staff…of Odyssey and Daedalus crew…” she said. “Caldwell has two children who Zelenka simply adores…most of those children are engineers of some kind… Why not let them help? It’s not like they won’t be supervised…after all, you supervised Rodney until he got into how missions work and how to be prepared for missions…”

He crinkled up his face, “But I don’t wanna be a babysitter… I’ve done that already with McKay…”

“Look, John…I’m not going to force you to take one of them with you… I just want to start integrating them into this expedition… Give them some purpose… I wouldn’t assign one of them to you anyways, without your approval…that would be unfair to them and you,” Elizabeth said thinking about how interesting things would be.

“So, I don’t have to take any of them?” John asked perking up. He liked that idea…that meant that he didn’t have to take on one of the children and play babysitter. It wasn’t exactly one of his favorite roles.

Elizabeth pushed forward a file, “I’ve talked to most of them… Not in great depth, but more just to feel like out… I’ve talked to Lily a lot about them, their personalities…strengths…and weaknesses… I know you don’t want one of them with you, but I thought that this person might meet with your approval…”

“Is this some kind of guilt trip?” he asked raising his eyebrows taking the file from her. “If it says Lily Sheppard I’m going to laugh…” he warned keeping his hand over the folder.

She shook her head, “Lily’s too ill, you know that, John…” Elizabeth wanted to add that it wasn’t something to joke about because for all they knew they’d loose Lily. Carson went back and forth on progress or regression reports. One day it looked good, and the next Carson didn’t give her more than a year to live. And though Elizabeth knew she was only her mother by biology at the moment, she still felt a ting of familiarity and motherly attachment to her, which included worry.

Looking down at the file, John slowly opened up the file and stared at the picture. He knew the person in the picture and he had to admit that there were others that he would have thought that Elizabeth would have suggested rather than the one he saw. John had to admit that the ones he had in mind were of another gender… “Caitlin Caldwell?” he questioned. He read over what Elizabeth had jotted down. She seemed reasonable and level-headed. But he wasn’t sure if he wanted her on a team.

“She’s capable, John…” Elizabeth pushed. “We all have to move on…”

John sighed and stared back down at the file, “But she’s a child…” he pointed out. “Shouldn’t she be attending some sort of school? All of them for that matter?”

“They don’t want to,” Elizabeth argued. “Just…please…think about it?” she asked gently. She felt like it was something that they all needed to do. It would be good for morale and her general sanity…

“I’ll think about it…” he told her with a small smile and then nodded his head in the direction of the door as he saw that Teyla had arrived and could hear Rodney arguing with Carson coming right behind her.


The team was ready to ship out a week after John made his decision about taking another person on. It had been hard for him to decide, Elizabeth had seemed to be guilt tripping him and he hated to have her disappointed at him. The military he could deal with, but he didn’t like it when Elizabeth was disappointed in him. It was an irk he had.

There had been another team who had reported back that there was a possible new trading partner on a rural planet with people who were willing to trade. They were going to see what they had to offer and what could be reasoned to trade for anything of interest. Mostly, it would be for food items, but he also figured looking at the local arts and crafts would come in use when he needed a present for someone.

The Atlantis gate slowly dialed out, and John looked about making sure that his team looked ready. Ronan and Teyla he didn’t worry about. Rodney looked bored, which was usually a good sign, it meant that he hadn’t seen anything shiny to be interested and over-hyped about. And then there was Caitlin Caldwell…he wasn’t sure what to think of her. She had performed well in all the training sessions he had had with her, but he knew he wouldn’t know for sure until they were out in the field.

As soon as the event horizon appeared, Ronan and Teyla started towards the Stargate. Rodney followed them after a second. John and Caitlin exchanged looks before John used his head to motion for her to go ahead. He turned and looked upward and saw Elizabeth watching them.

“Good luck,” she told him when she saw him looking back at her.

He gave her his classic boyish smile, “Don’t worry…I’ll look after the kids…” he told her before turning around. There was a kind of tension that he had been feeling ever since the ‘future kids’ had appeared that had seemed to have faded away…it was nice. John took that thought with him as he approached the gate and hoped it was some kind of good omen towards their mission.


The End
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