Reviewer: From the Stars Signed Date: May 22, 2009 - 09:39 am Title: Anything for anyone...Especially you.

Loved it, loved it, loved it. The emotion and characterisation was brilliant and it fit perfectly into Season 3.

Reviewer: brains103 Signed Date: March 13, 2007 - 11:02 pm Title: Anything for anyone...Especially you.

Awww! So sweet! I love it!

Reviewer: mew Signed Date: March 13, 2007 - 06:46 pm Title: Anything for anyone...Especially you.

Yay! That was a lovely ending. Very cute story! ;)

Reviewer: lostgrace Signed Date: March 13, 2007 - 09:50 am Title: Anything for anyone...Especially you.

Another nice chapter!

Reviewer: Trista Signed Date: March 12, 2007 - 06:32 pm Title: Healing

I' am SOOOOO curious!!!!!!!! I wanna know, what Lizzie is about to say! Please update soon. I really like this story :)

Reviewer: brains103 Signed Date: March 11, 2007 - 05:35 pm Title: Healing

great chapter!!! please don't keep us in suspense too long!

Reviewer: lostgrace Signed Date: March 10, 2007 - 11:57 pm Title: Healing

Love this story! Will be waiting for more.. You do offworld stuff a lot better than I could!

Author's Response: Oh, I don't know about that. I've been reading Letters and I am loving it!

Reviewer: mew Signed Date: March 10, 2007 - 07:15 pm Title: Healing

Cool chapter. Glad John's ok. I really want to know what Elizabeth's gonna say! Update quick!

Reviewer: brains103 Signed Date: March 07, 2007 - 01:54 am Title: Emergency

congratulations on your engagement! i was disappointed too with the end of season 3. what's going to happen???? anyway, great writing! keep it up!

Reviewer: mew Signed Date: March 06, 2007 - 06:21 pm Title: Emergency

Very nice. Good interaction with the characters. Hope you update ASAP! :)

Reviewer: brains103 Signed Date: February 05, 2007 - 02:54 pm Title: Fallen Rescue

terrific! i love the part where they take shots for each other!

Reviewer: brains103 Signed Date: January 20, 2007 - 06:19 pm Title: Coming to a Consensus

interesting! please keep going!

Reviewer: Oparu Signed Date: January 20, 2007 - 12:26 am Title: Coming to a Consensus

oh a plan! There are a couple grammar things. Please consider getting a beta?

Reviewer: Oparu Signed Date: January 20, 2007 - 12:24 am Title: Bait and Switch

Oh, self-sacrifical John is always sweet. I hope Elizabeth gets to save him!

Reviewer: Oparu Signed Date: January 20, 2007 - 12:17 am Title: Leaving

Taking a page of Ronon's book is nice. :) well done John.

Words in your head is a good way to start. I usually find myself hearing what's going on instead of seeing it. I try to force myself to remember there are five sense, not just one. It's important to hear the dialogue, but at the same time you can taste adrenaline. Feel the tighteness in your chest, smell the stale air in the cell and see little details that bring life to a story.

I hope you understand I'm not picking on you. I just think if you're going to tell a story, you should do it so no one else could possibly tell it as well as you can, or in the same way.

Reviewer: mew Signed Date: January 19, 2007 - 07:00 pm Title: Coming to a Consensus

Wow! This story is amazing. I can't wait to hear Elizabeth's plan. :)

Reviewer: mew Signed Date: January 19, 2007 - 06:55 pm Title: Bait and Switch

That is soo sad. John is so sweet in this. And you make the characters seem so real. Fantastic chapter.

Reviewer: brains103 Signed Date: January 18, 2007 - 09:50 pm Title: Leaving

wow! you're really good at making the story suspenseful. i love it!

Author's Response: Suspenseful is what I was going for- glad you think so...^_^ I love it too!

Reviewer: mew Signed Date: January 18, 2007 - 03:45 pm Title: Leaving

Good chapter.

Author's Response: Thanks mew!

Reviewer: Vicky Signed Date: January 18, 2007 - 10:33 am Title: Leaving

OMG!
I can't wait to read more of this!

Author's Response: Thank you...you now have more...^_^

Reviewer: Steph7085 Signed Date: January 18, 2007 - 08:14 am Title: Leaving

Whats going on? I have to know...please update soon!

Author's Response: Thank you!

Reviewer: mew Signed Date: January 17, 2007 - 05:49 pm Title: Partial Answers

Very nice chapter. Looking forward to more :)

Author's Response: Thank you!

Reviewer: brains103 Signed Date: January 17, 2007 - 02:34 am Title: Partial Answers

good storyline! very intriguing! keep it up!

Author's Response: I'm glad you like it...^_^ I most definitly will keep it up.

Reviewer: Oparu Signed Date: January 16, 2007 - 09:51 pm Title: Partial Answers

Your grammar is all right. Your characters are a thin, but decent. You need depth. You're a promising writer, because you have a solid skeleton you just need to work on provoking an emotional response. Right now all of your stories are rather dry. Things happen, people react, but nothing is really fleshed out.

Work on the senses to bring life to your stories. Show what's going on instead of telling us.

For example,

“And you wouldn’t need weapons, would you?” Elizabeth asked, praying that they’d say no because she didn’t like trading weapons.

Elizabeth would be morally against trading weapons. Her background before Atlantis was in negotiating against the proliferation of most weapons. Go beyond dislike.

“And what would that be?” Elizabeth asked, trying to asses the situation with the warning bells getting louder.

Explain that her hands were sweating. Her stomach tightened. Elizabeth's lips get thin when she's apprehensive when you watch the show.

Elaborate. Think deeper about your characters and how you describe them and I think you'll be a great writer someday.

Author's Response: Thank you for the honest critique....I'll work on it.

Reviewer: Steph7085 Signed Date: January 16, 2007 - 09:13 pm Title: Partial Answers

OMG! Please update soon! I can't wait for the next chapter!

Author's Response: You'll have an update tomorrow Steph, don't you worry. ^_^ I'm glad that you can't wait though. ^_^

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